Sandy Petersen's Cthulhu Mythos - The Big Sleep 07

[00:00:16] The Rancors Brothel presents... The Big Sleep, The Mythos 5e Adventure

[00:01:25] From there it is, Flintstern. I should count kills. I've had a fuck-tun already. Keep it to alley. Four or five, yeah? No, no, no. Just this combat. Yeah. Well, also true. So they're dispersing but...

[00:01:42] Yeah no, they're all dispersing in different angles and different directions. You can't even see those other ones because they're behind walls. The doorway would be the only vision you have and you have no vision on any of them. Gotcha. So you're not aware, you might hear footsteps

[00:01:54] in the distance but that's all you're kind of catching. But we're still in combat. At this point, would you like to do anything? I mean, yeah. Basically, they've all disengaged and double moved. Well, they're double moved, I mean.

[00:02:14] I think they can run, which is what? Four times they speak? I haven't seen what's... You don't even know. You see three dead bodies and you kind of, you might kind of hear some distant... But what is the roof? What does it look like?

[00:02:27] Yeah, what does it look like? Is it lit? So lit! It's... Ow, fuck! Put my ass! It is actually pretty lit right in here. You're not wrong. Ah, always hardcore. There's light from both left and right that it's given you enough. Yeah, as I say.

[00:02:46] Cody, are you chasing or are you good? I don't know what the room looks like. You said it was so lit and then... It's lit up. You didn't draw it, you didn't tell me, is it a hallway?

[00:02:58] No, it opens up. Let me get back to the map here. Is it a... It opens up directly in front of you. You do see another sarcophagi about... About 20 feet in front of you. Because all the other sarcophagi were empty, right? It's a... Yes.

[00:03:22] It's a 30 by 15 space and beyond... It's kind of drawn weird. So you got 15 foot of wall on either side and then an open space for 10 feet. And there's a wall directly in front of you. So there are two exits on left and right, 15 feet to the left.

[00:03:43] So they both fucking exit stage left, exit stage right. All four of them split off and took off. Oh, yeah, I see those two. They're four cowards. They are gone. You did not see them. Can I go pull my axe? Are we still in combat?

[00:03:57] At this point, I'm probably gonna say you're out of combat. You can take your axes back. They're just in better than skulls. Yeah, I'm gonna take my axes back and I'm gonna go look at the sarcophagus. You don't smell any dead as per usual...

[00:04:08] As per before, you did not smell the dead. I'm gonna... If you allow me, I will flip the sarcophagus anyway. It's empty. Ack! Does anybody else need any healing? I took a couple points, but not a lot. You may do so if you wish. I'm gonna go pee.

[00:04:23] I think I took three points. You get three points back. Oh, nice. Let me double check. I think I took three. I did take three. Thank you. You hit me for six, numb nuts? Alex, did you get hit at all?

[00:04:37] I think it was going to and then he redicked on it. So you took six? I took six, but I took three because I was raging. So no, I can take three. Because I think I confused him with some of the things I was saying

[00:04:50] and he had no idea what to do. Are you fully healed? I'm healed now, yeah. If he did, I'm just gonna wipe it because we're gonna level up soon anyway. So I'm not worried about it. That's fair. So did you get hit? Fuck if I know. I...

[00:05:10] You know, I need to introduce you to some people, Alex, because I think your gameplay would be vastly improved. I... You do well on your own now, but like... I need to... You need to have a chat with a few people. I'm always up for meeting new folks.

[00:05:28] Whether or not they're ready for me is another story. Is anybody ever ready for their first interaction with me, really? I think you're solid, dude. I think you. Big fan. That's a very kind of you. Big fan. You have finished chapter one at this point.

[00:05:46] You may all level up to level two. Oh, you've made a big fucking mistake. Are you... How are you doing hit points? You roll hit points. What do you want me to do? Are you doing Jeff's thing or no? Oh, if I roll...

[00:06:00] Whoever rolls higher, you take the higher. I'm just asking. Yeah, we can do that. That's kind of fun. Okay, so it's what happens if you equal. Something special happens if you equal, right? No, you just take... You just get it. Whatever. I think there was something special.

[00:06:13] Thank you, re-roll. Or I've heard a version of that. I rolled a 10, so you don't need to roll. What was your hit die? A 10. Oh, well, if I roll a 10, you re-roll. No. Go fuckers. What's your hit die, Alex? It's an eight. An eight? I rolled a five.

[00:06:44] I rolled a two. So then you take five plus con. Eight for me as well. Eight for you as well. We actually watched Space Seed before we played Iconoclass last week. Five. It was on Pluto TV. Oh, really? Okay.

[00:06:58] I rolled a one, so you take the five plus con. I think you're a D... Yeah, are you also a D? Don't tell me what I am. Barbarians are 12s. Are they 12s? Don't tell me... He's multi-classing. Tell me my business, devil woman. Call the fire department.

[00:07:13] This was out of control. Don't tell me what I am. I need to take a second. Oh, yeah, if you're multi-classing, they're gonna say... He's gonna find himself. It could be different. Are you multi-classing in level two? Yes! Eat shit.

[00:07:25] My only goal this game is to ruin your experience. I think it's gonna be one level in every class. Do what you want, that's fine. No, no, no. I proposed an idea based on what I read in the mythos book

[00:07:36] that he provided to us, which was dumb of him. I said... It's important for you to know what's going on in this era. Yeah, but dumb of you. In this segment. Because now I'm prepared. And I sent it... I said, you know, I'm thinking about this

[00:07:50] and I'm thinking about this and I talked to a few people and they were like, you know you could really tweak it this way. And I went, oh... So you're gonna multi-class rogue? I'm gonna make a rogue. Eat shit? You have no idea what I'm doing.

[00:08:01] Initially you were gonna make a rogue, so that's... Or a wizard, one of the two. Rogue barbarians are gross. Zug wizard would have been the way to go, just fair. I thought about it. But then somebody pitched this to me, so you need to roll a d10.

[00:08:19] I rolled a nine. I rolled a seven. Okay, so I get nine. Plus con. Correct. I'm gonna fire three so I get 12. That depends on which... What... Uh, this isn't... Are you allowing us to be at maximum hit points? What do you mean? We just leveled up.

[00:08:37] I just went from 15 to 27. Oh, you healed up. You're fine. Yeah, oh, you're fine. Spell slots too? Spell slots do require a rest. So if you want to rest, you may. Ah, not my main question. Are you allowing firearms in this game? You're an artificer.

[00:08:55] At some point you will eventually get them. I can make them whenever. That's not the question I'm asking as the DM. Are they allowed in this particular world? Oh, you're a fuck. Fantastic. Oh, you've hurt. Fantastic. How advanced can I make it? Are we talking like...

[00:09:13] Oh, exactly what I'm gonna do. Revolutionary war? Are we talking about... This character dies. Down at the... Warthogs? Are we talking about 40k? So I clicked on a shirt the other day and I have to buy a key to keep advertising it to me. It's a picture of...

[00:09:26] It depends on how advanced you want them to be. A D&D wizard. There's a list of examples. And he's opening his cloak and he's pulling out like a Spass 12. And it says, I may be all out of spells, but I'm not all out of shells.

[00:09:42] Open that particular page just so you have an idea. There's another one with a wizard holding his hands over his head. And it says, A10 Warthog goes, BIRT! The Renaissance era is more applicable, I would think. You're not shooting lasers. That would be too high.

[00:09:59] And modern is too high, so... For the audience, I am multiclassed into level fighter level one. Kind of like revolutionary kind of stuff. This gets that kind of thing. Well, it's literally called Renaissance. Can my cat have lasers? Wanted to make sure I wasn't going above the...

[00:10:14] So it's a pistol and they... Is it... Are they flintlock? I didn't read it. It's loaded two hands, so it's something like that. But that doesn't mean I can't... It's still a gun, it's just a little less fast. I can make it a little better as an artificer.

[00:10:29] Over time. Right now. I'm gonna make one and... So do you have a long rest to make that? What's that? Is it a long rest to make that? With my tools, let me check. He's just in the corner. What the fuck is he doing five minutes later?

[00:10:48] I have a gun! I don't... I don't... I don't... I don't... I like how somehow we've gone from... I can make a small tool to craft Glock. Flintlock pistol. Not quite a Glock. Uh, long rest.

[00:11:06] So you guys need to take eight hours for having to make a gun. Uh, what time is it? No idea. Midnight or shortly after. Getting late. It wasn't quite midnight. The mass hadn't started. They were just coming down to get ready, basically.

[00:11:21] I just need to run to the... Corner store to grab a couple pieces of equipment I need. You mean the alchemy on the corner that you guys had condemned? It's... He's not even in prison. We were using that as a front. He is a patsy.

[00:11:37] He was being used as a front so he gets the next guy. He was arrested and he's with the guard under surveillance at his shop. Uh... Looks like I'll need to sell my light crossbow to get the equipment to make the musket first.

[00:11:54] Because I am upgrading to the industrial revolution here, people. As of right now you are literally walking into the catacombs underneath of the cathedral. Exactly what that becomes now. Good luck, Lucas! I plan on ruining your game. So we're going down to the catacombs, you said?

[00:12:12] Yeah, you've entered to what appears to be the entrance to the catacombs. Well, you were told that the catacombs were through that door. So... Uh, I guess I'll follow the rest of my party down into the dark area with all the creepy people. Cool. Silly question.

[00:12:31] What are you doing with all these bodies? They're not going anywhere. Chopping off hands! Oh. Which end, Troy? All of them. Did we remember to loot these bodies before we're moving on? No, no, no. Because of the tokens? Well, only this one.

[00:12:48] So we got that one for the pick. So we'll need to make sure we get all their fun stuff. Each one has, aside from the guy that was in yellow, which Flynn already took care of, each one has a silver pendant. Uh, let's see...

[00:13:04] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Two, three, four, five, six. He's already been taking care of it. One, oh, six. Yellow was taken for the rest of us? I mean, it's party gold. Doesn't matter. You were told by the way to take the right hand specifically. Okay.

[00:13:23] Of each one? We're taking the right hand. Take both just in case. And their dicks. Oh. How many right hands? We can take the dicks. Just one or all of them? That's good eating. Some of them. Tell you what. Somebody wrote me a history check. He throws him...

[00:13:41] He... Throws high history. Everybody wrote whatever. You see Cyrus roasting them on the Barbie? Hot dog. 15. Cool. You were told to take the right hand and to bind the amulet into the hand with either bandages

[00:13:59] or some sort of wrap, and to return them to the priest at the Abbey. Just one of those little concoctions. He told you to bring back five of them. Five. Five. Okay. Because you got to remember, first off, we've accomplished that.

[00:14:12] But second off, we were also getting paid a significant amount of money to return them to the other guys. So we got to figure out like what's more valuable. Get them to him and say, We've completed the quest. Can we have them back?

[00:14:21] You were told that you would get more information from him if you brought him five hands, five right hands with emblems inside. Right. But he's going to take them. Like we could show them... Well, he's going to put them somewhere. We could show them to the king.

[00:14:37] Get paid for them. Oh, does the king take them? Yeah. The arbiter has given you 15 gold piece for silver. Yeah. For the silver ones. Can we show them to him and he can write invisible ink on the backside and then say,

[00:14:51] Hey, we really got to take these somewhere else? Like he doesn't need them. Just throw it out there. Maybe we can argue for that. Or maybe we bring it to the priest, get the information, then take him back.

[00:15:01] I'm assuming he needs it done that way for a very specific reason to which he will be keeping them and performing some sort of ritual or something that way. If we don't agree with the ritual, we kill him and take his pendant too. He wasn't wearing a pendant.

[00:15:16] He was a priest of the Abbey. I'm sure he has something valuable. He's a religious figure. Most of them do. Most religious figures we have with Levin Squalor. I feel like we're going to come across these fairly decently. Like let's take five of the six that we have.

[00:15:32] Well, we got seven technically. That is true. So we have two. The gold one we're going to keep. Oh yeah. So. Yeah, the gold one is different. You've not seen that before. Well hold on to one. It's the same sigil but it's in gold.

[00:15:42] Well hold on to one free one and then I don't know give the gold. So we found one silver, one gold above the extra five. So one of them had a silver and one of them had a gold.

[00:15:53] Yeah, I don't remember where the silver one came off of but the gold one came off of this guy. Well, so you have five plus one extra silver and one extra gold. Right. Yeah, correct. Does that count the groundskeepers? He took off. He's gone.

[00:16:06] But I took it off of him. Oh, that one would be silver. So you would have two silver and a gold then. Okay. You are correct. Somebody write that down. And if you wish you would also have five right hands. Five wrapped. Bound with the sigil inside.

[00:16:21] And so then the question is are you cutting through the catacombs or are you going back to the abbey first? It's not super late. It's maybe 10 o'clock. These guys were obviously coming down here to prepare for the said mass. Well, while these guys are planning,

[00:16:42] I start shoving bodies into sarcophagi that aren't occupied. Sure. No problem. There you go. That's what I do. No problem at all. I say we explore a little bit and just see what at least what's in the next room because these guys ran off to somewhere. Yeah.

[00:16:56] All these guys are gone now. All those guys, yeah, the whole board is gone. Those guys are all in boxes. These guys ran away. Alex stuffed dead bodies into sarcophagus. So, coffee. No problem. Let me know if they're old dead bodies. I'm really interested in old dead bodies.

[00:17:12] Your fellow members did take the five right hands. They bound them with the sigils, leaving you guys with two silver and one gold sigil. That's fair. I think I support this decision. The question was are you exploring? Are you going back to the abbey? Yeah, we're exploring.

[00:17:27] We just got like I more than doubled my hit points. So let's fucking go. Cool. You guys were at level two other than your hit points. What'd you guys get? Cody, what else did you get? How did you more than double? I didn't more than double.

[00:17:39] Lucas doesn't, he's being exaggeration. You can only double. I know he's exaggerating. Let's move on. First off, suck a dick, Lucas. Second off, I'm multiclassed into fighter. Try everything once. What? Multiclassed into fighter. Yes. Okay. Which fighter first level provides me with a fighting style and second wind?

[00:18:01] Very true. Troy. The more you wanted to that, okay. You went on to Troy. I don't, I mean unless you want to give me more. If there's things you don't want me to know, that's fine. No, no, no, I took unarmed fighting.

[00:18:14] So now you have dual wielding and unarmed? Yes. Fun. Troy. I gained a fighting style. I'm going to choose... You didn't multiclass into fighter? No. Okay. I'm going to choose defense. Makes sense. I also got some spells. Yeah, you have to do that.

[00:18:37] And I got my divine smite. Nice. I now have key. So I have two key coins I can use. I can do... I already got the keys. Oh, there you go. Oh, never mind. Never mind. I'm fine. How the hell does that get into... It's a key strike.

[00:18:56] Key strike. It's spelled differently. I appreciate that. Yep. Because I think piano. Do you remember the video game Jade Empire? Key strike. I fucking love that game. Good game. Good game. I'm surprised they never... I'm surprised they never rediff that one actually.

[00:19:11] Thousands of years of history in Southeast Asia and you go with a video game. As he does. Yeah, I don't live in Southeast Asia so I don't know the history that well. Uncultured. All I know was movies and video games, dude. Key or chi, depending on...

[00:19:26] I feel like I'm having a brain. No, it was pronounced key in the video game. I know. That's... It's key or chi, depending on who you're talking to. Correct. Anyway, flag. Anyway, it's a key strike. So I can do flare blows, making three attacks in a round. Nice.

[00:19:38] I can do patient defense. It's been one to take the dodge action as a bonus action and then step of the wind, one key point to disengage or dash as a bonus action. Mine is probably actually better than yours though. Nice. Which one? My three. Oh, probably.

[00:19:55] It's fucking broke. Okay. Outs. I can now infuse items so I can take Monday in objects and turn them into magical ones with certain characteristics. Do you have to choose four specific options? Or you said something like... You're limited to the four you choose, correct?

[00:20:14] So each level I have a certain amount of options I can do and every time I do a long rest I can touch an object or several and infuse them with a particular trait. For the list I have currently, I chose four two levels

[00:20:32] and they get stronger as they go. Sure. The ones I chose were return weapon which allows somebody to basically call back their weapon and gives them a bonus to their weapon attribute, a plus one to both attack rolls and damage. That was so first level.

[00:20:51] I literally told Jeff when we started talking about this character that I'm like at first level Lucas, I'm going to go. At second level I'm just going to go. So basically that's just an overview of it. Sure. So every long rest I can just do that.

[00:21:08] The infusion acts indefinitely or if I end up dying it goes for X amount of days equivalent to my intelligence minus one day. Or if I decide to cancel it out I can cancel it out as anytime I touch it and can do again.

[00:21:26] If I decide to do more than my limits the last one I infused overwrites the first one I infused. I like the idea that you do it on the trident because just like throwing a trident

[00:21:38] and someone is fucking disgusting like and then the fact that Troy could be like yoyk and it comes back on a string like a yo-yo and throws it again. So here's the thing too it's like basically as soon as I get my long rest done

[00:21:52] if you guys have weapons or what have you then ta-da! But are you going to do the repeating shot that we talked about? As soon as I can build my musket I'm going to get the repeated shot on that and probably put the um...

[00:22:10] Because reloading is for chumps. Return weapon on somebody else's weapon so they could have lots of fun with it. Sure. Right now there's only one person who's really using a weapon which is Troy so also you have axes with the...

[00:22:26] If I didn't know we were going to level two I would have cinematically not pulled the axes out of those guys' heads. The way this is written literally at the end of the chapter you just level up. I understand.

[00:22:36] Cinematically the axes are still in their heads and I walk away. You're gonna leave them? Maybe. Just might. The infused item also allows me to mimic certain enchanted items like a bag of holding or the uh... Nighgoggles. So it's one of those things where it's like,

[00:22:59] hey there's these very expensive objects I can make them. So there you go but I can only do two for now. Yeah. That's a big problem. Okay and I use the GM don't level up so

[00:23:17] I did draw a slight space this is what you see further beyond the door about 15 feet forward is just a wall on your left and right you do see a sarcophagus in front of you and a wall a wall beyond that by five feet.

[00:23:38] So there is an opening to your left and right and I will ask again are you long well I guess and shit in terms of the rules of 5e you must long rest in order to level up. Therefore you must take eight hours of rest.

[00:23:58] So if you are leveling up you are taking eight hours which will get your spell slots back. My request my requested information for you at this point then if we decide to long rest so we can restock level up get done what we need to get done.

[00:24:17] Don't worry he'll hear me. Sir can you give me a wet wipe for this? If we do that. I'll give you a hug. We're at 10 o'clock a.m. right now right. I bought you crackin. Are we at 10 o'clock a.m. or p.m. you just said 10 o'clock.

[00:24:33] It's p.m. It's p.m. Just making sure it's not 2200 hours. How's it p.m.? We were midnight with the fight eight hours. It wasn't midnight yet. It wasn't midnight yet. So we were coming back they were coming down to prepare for the mass.

[00:24:50] Mass had not started yet. For some reason I kept thinking we were doing things during the day when we were talking to the car. It was lady it was like late evening and again people at home it has been a month and a

[00:25:01] half since we played forgive me if I don't remember the time frame lady. In that case in that case. Keep your notes. I suggest we go wherever we can to rest because bad things happen.

[00:25:15] You can find an N if you want it's not going to cost you a fuck ton. We have access to the burned down flop house we have or no. Well the flop house is no apartment under the burned out apartments.

[00:25:27] The guards have that under what about the potion place? It's not really a house. I don't care is there floor space? We have a cat he's not going to care. All of the places you have gone that you have had people arrested at

[00:25:44] means you have had all the guards come to that place. Those places are now air quote taped off because the police have them in an under investigation. You've lost all those places. If you want to go to an N you can. Question are these sarcophagi like stone?

[00:26:06] Are we talking like? They are stone but they're not heavy. Are they no no I'm not asking that I'm like are we talking like old school stone? Or are we talking like modern day caskets? No some of these are ancient sarcophagi.

[00:26:28] I just wanted to know if there's light padding in there because I could take a nap in there. Find me a body. I'm not worried about the bodies I'm wondering.

[00:26:36] I understand that I'm asking because I need to do a long rest and I'm sure the rest of us do as well. Well in order to level up a long rest is necessary. Whether you do it here or there does not matter to me.

[00:26:52] Then let's just do it here then because you all have a bed rolls you can lay down and because you don't want us to do anything comfortably anymore. We can take shifts. Cat stays on shift all night. It doesn't need to be cats don't sleep.

[00:27:07] I actually think I might have a rule for that. You can go into the dreamlands as a cat. Because you are a dreamlands cat but that's a different situation. Question about the dreamlands I didn't read too heavily on that because I didn't want to

[00:27:21] vote to stay here and rest or go somewhere else and rest. We have to rest to get to level up. Per the rules. Because it's like I disappear into this other dimension essentially. We're still on the rule book. Currently shortly before midnight.

[00:27:39] Let's call it 11 30 between 11 short rest or long rest. Long rest is to level up so it's eight hour rest. Per the rules of the look. Bring about 7 a.m. if you want to sleep. You can also sleep here. You have bed rolls you can make a camp here.

[00:28:01] It doesn't matter. Here's yeah yeah no my thought is that do we think that their worship at midnight is upstairs or here? Oh it's definitely here. Yeah it's below us. It's below us. But we just interrupted it. What are we sure? Uh I mean. Romantic. That's fair.

[00:28:24] Who's rolling you in sight? You. You're asking us the highest level. Probably not the fucking barbarian. I don't know sometimes. I throw a four. Flynn give me Bartik inspiration. Can you do that? I don't even have it noted. Plus two. Okay hold on. Jesus Christ. 12.

[00:28:49] I was going to give you a 10 as a median. Yeah. 18. That's even better. You're good. You're good to sleep here. Close the door. Close the door lock it. He has the keys. Right. This is him. You literally can close the trapdoor to the stairs lock that shit. Wait.

[00:29:07] The priest by the way never came back. Not worried about the priest. What about the guy who shoved the door open? Check them for keys. He opened the door. No. The other people who shoved it open. He locked the door. You're fancy.

[00:29:20] Oh no those guys just have fucking peered. So there's key running around that we don't have. No the dark blue guy had keys. Yeah the noble. We searched the bodies. Yeah so at this point you have two sets of keys to this door.

[00:29:33] I mean close the door lock it. Set a watch. Go to sleep. Yeah. Make a gun. Level up. Make fuck up. He can't make a gun yet. I don't have the materials. He's got to have the materials. What materials? I need iron, wood a couple other things.

[00:29:47] I got the tools I just don't have the materials. It's pretty specific to build a gun. Yeah. Gilded pickaxes iron. That would be gold. I don't think so. Iron and gold. Gold. Dirt gold plated. Yeah that's what gilded is. Is gold plated. Should be a dope ass.

[00:30:03] Not specified that way. Zimitar. That's what gilded means. That is kind of the definition we don't know. How do I know? What's the definition of gilded? Fuck. The adjective gilded is usually defined. Ask me to give you more definitions for gilded. So gold covered. No but thank you.

[00:30:26] It's almost like more of us just said that. I'm going to continue to say no. It's solid code. You used to like this and bend it. I run the game. I run the game. I'll accept it because I don't have any.

[00:30:40] I am the game and how I pray it. I don't know the words of this song. What's what is there? Zimitar made out of Lucas. Iron. I'm less worried about that and more about a smithing station because I'm just going to let it go. Don't help him.

[00:30:55] I'm not helping him. I want you fucking shotgunning through like we just walk around the corner blam blam reloaded. Until he has the components no gun exists. Until that time though once we level up. It doesn't matter I'm gonna fuck up his game already.

[00:31:10] Until that time though once we level up who wants the bonuses on their weapons. Right now he's the only one using weapons. Who wants a bag of holding? I feel like the cat. Everyone needs a bag of holding. Make a bag of holding. A bag of holding.

[00:31:31] Like no no no like I want Flynn to have a goddamn fanny pack and fucking like javelins and goddamn ninja stars and a fucking parade clown. He doesn't want a house cat with a backpack.

[00:31:45] Level I can have up to six or eight infused items so until that time you guys will have to settle. I would rather have chickens I think than cats. Chickens are pretty useful. We've talked about having chicken Flynn. Chickens I have almost.

[00:31:59] Okay so you wanted to we're not doing bird talk here and you now have a bag of holding so you need to read up a little strong how long does it take you to make it that bag of

[00:32:09] holding one long rest and I just have to touch the items. Touch my fanny pack. Any items that they have that they want me to give the bonus to he said he had a satchel he says he has a trident. Okay. Done.

[00:32:24] Do the items disappear once you touch them? No. Why would they disappear? The magic goes into the items. So this becomes a returning trident. Because a trident. Right. This becomes a. Oh you're making a returning trident and a bag of holding. Yes.

[00:32:39] I don't know if you can do two things one long rest. That sounds OP to me. I'm sorry. Infuse item infusion. Infusing an item whenever you finish a long rest you can touch a non-magical item and impute it with one of your artificial infusions. Item one.

[00:32:56] If you decide to attune an item you can. Item one. You can infuse more than one non-magical object at the end of a long rest. The magical number of objects appears in the fused item column of the art officer table.

[00:33:13] You must touch each of the objects and each of your infusions can be in only one object at a time. Moreover no object can bear more than one of your infusions at a time.

[00:33:23] If you try to exceed your maximum number of infusions the oldest infusions end and the new infusion applies. So how many infusions total can you have at a time? Lawyers. Two currently. So you are at your max? So I am.

[00:33:37] So the Dragonborn jerks off twice and you guys get two items. Basically I just went into twins and they both have children. Moving on. Skeet-Skeet and you're good. Moving on. So you both have magic items and he got his dirty whatever.

[00:33:53] You are just at the atrium of what you are seeing or catechoms. I get less. Unless you leave to go back to the city. As I get more alcohol.

[00:34:04] We lock the door and we sleep right here and we dare them to come back and fight us like a bunch like the bunch of pussies that they are. No one shows up. Because they're goddamn cowards. Well they know what the ghoul did to them last time.

[00:34:17] Fuck yeah and I leveled up. I am so much more dangerous now. And you know what? So Lucas, Lucas fucked up. You know why Lucas fucked up? In light. He let me sleep. I have more rages now.

[00:34:32] You know usually people get less rage when they get sleep but Blink can back me up. Not barbarians. He has a baby now. This isn't a barbarian feat. This is Cody who sleeps and gets angry. I wish I could sleep. I get up at 5 30 most days.

[00:34:46] I am always angry. Go fuck yourself. Anyway the catechoms directly adjoin the cathedral. The cathedral basement and occupy the eastern end of the cathedral's undercropped. It's contagious. They are accessible through a wrought iron door from the basement which is the door you opened. Wrought iron door.

[00:35:05] It's a wrought iron door. Stout pillars supporting the cathedral and bell towers above crowd this dark dusty space. Tightly packed stone shelves run between them. Are droger on those shelves? Each holding a wooden coffin. More coffins leaning against the walls next to the out coast stuff with bones.

[00:35:32] Bones? Bones? I said bones. Hold on. Hold on. Only bones? Is there anything wrong with this? I would like to know the location within 60 feet of us of any celestial fiend or undead. And also if there's anything that has been consecrated or desecrated.

[00:35:55] It's a thing palagins can do. Divine sense baby. That's a zero across the board. Cool. You know I wouldn't mind bringing it on the podcast just once. It's who? A fucking cat. Like a once per day thing? No, I can do it. He's a real person.

[00:36:13] Uh four times five times. Five times a day? A day. What's that? What's that called? When he played the palagins. Divine sense. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. I just couldn't remember who did it. All of us have some good spells. And cantrips.

[00:36:29] I'd like to know when evil shits around. Right? So we can smite the shit out of it. You're at the age room of the catagums what do you want to do? Unlock the door go through it. Well the door's open you're there.

[00:36:42] Is there a left and a right? There's a left and a right. Way to the penis. Closing the door and locking it. Josh hangs left we go left. So when you go left so again there's a sarcophagi, unopened sarcophagi there. No no. No you did open it.

[00:37:01] Because I want to fuck. I apologize. Find me a dead body. I apologize you open it's empty. You can smell death right? How can you do a lot of things to smell death but. When you turn left you do see it does go about 15 feet left again.

[00:37:18] He just has a whole sleeve. Oh sure. I think that box is empty. Oh no. It's half empty. About 15 feet to the left. You see. It's not making home. You see. I don't deal in drugs but I deal in stuff that's fairly close. Cookies. You do see. Sugar.

[00:37:38] Yeah you do see a sarcophagi that's leaning up against the wall to your right. Droga. It does continue to another open space. I throw the lid of the sarcophagus open. It's situations like this that make me feel like I should multi-class into necromancer. Yeah. Sure.

[00:38:02] Just as something off the top of my head. He throws the lid open what happens. DM. Six black dragons. No. Every time. You dropped something. I didn't. As long as it's not one white plus gold dragon I'll be fine. Oh. Through the sarcophagus.

[00:38:26] Yeah fuck them I'm not gonna mess around but it's still the left right. Well now it's in front of you so. Right but if I stand at a 45 degree angle to both directions it's to the left right. Sure. Left through the sarcophagus.

[00:38:47] We gotta go through the haunted house. There's no other option. You choose one direction left and you keep going left until you can't go anymore. It's how you solve the maze. Psyduck legac accurate follow Josh's penis. You come to a ladder that goes up to a trapdoor.

[00:39:05] Okay okay. Trapdoor got it. It's not a very far it's like. Alex less than 10 feet corridor to we always go we always go left because Josh's dick is at a 45 degree angle to the left. He has to barrel roll to have sex. That's always been the joke.

[00:39:23] He's majorly hung in a certain direction. Way the penis is left. Way the penis is always left. I thought you were making a reference to Greek. Nope not at all. Nope not even a little bit.

[00:39:34] Josh's dick goes to the left Flynn Fodge myself a few others always in a situation we go left. I've had to endure this for 95 percent of them. It's okay actually it helps to have somebody who hasn't been exposed to all the jokes yet

[00:39:47] because then you can rehash them. Yeah I know it's great. 95 percent. I knew you would hate it. Way the penis where's the trapdoor go. 95 percent of the male population hang left. That can't be accurate is it? No your left-handed what do you got? Don't be shy.

[00:40:06] No reason to explain this to you. Don't be shy. I feel like I'm pretty straight onward if I had to say. You're not straight. Nobody's. His dick is. Let me put it this way. I mean I'm right-handed but I beat off with my left so.

[00:40:19] That's gotta be unusual. You're lefty? All right. That's gotta be unusual. It's called the stranger. I've had no complaints. Extra checks. Stop. Troy sits on it for 10 minutes. This is called the stranger. What's up the trapdoor? This is all stained anyway. Oh yeah absolutely. Absolutely. Leg up. Like.

[00:40:42] Walk down the corridor yet. No. I'm really lefty right? Like that has to be oddball right? I can't do anything with my left hand. All right there's one vote. So that's smart. This is all in character. We're under the trapdoor just telling dick jokes. No it's not.

[00:40:59] Why wouldn't we? This is real talk. We're deep down in the picture. That asshole uses mage hand. I haven't gotten that as a cantrip yet. It's called mage girlfriend. You could take any cantrip you want. I can. I haven't decided if I wanted to shift things over yet.

[00:41:16] Every 14 year old was choosing the mage hand. Male female doesn't fucking matter. Hey I'm a lizard I need to. It's the mage hand stranger. All right so what's up the trapdoor? Right into Raycors Brothel at gmail.com

[00:41:32] if you jerk off with the opposite hand that you actually write with. Eventually you find yourself underneath a bed. All right are we talking and joking? Fucking little monsters here? I'm not joking no this is the game. Oh thank you. I am.

[00:41:47] Is it like clanging against a bed? Yeah kind of. You push it open and it goes boom but you look up and you're like oh that's a mattress above me. This is just like a quick escape slash entrance. I don't know I'm finding the fuck out.

[00:42:04] I'm gonna slip up past them and stealth. Yeah little fucker can do that. That sounds like more of a plan than what I would do. I will stealth. That is 16. Perfect you are underneath the bed at this point of whatever room you're standing in.

[00:42:22] All right I'm gonna like sitle to the edge of the bed and just kind of peer out. You don't see any people or feet? Any pictures? Yeah what's it look like? What kind of looks like a pretty mundane room? Okay so not magical. I'll uh.

[00:42:39] I thought he could detect that no. I mean does it. So obviously it's a bedroom. Does it look like it's lived in or is this like a. Just because there's a bed. In a room doesn't mean it's a bedroom okay. That's fair. I shouldn't presume. It could be.

[00:42:56] You don't tell this room what it is. It could be a cell. Oh you're all going to hell me too. Nice Simon. No defining features. I ask us did it is it lived in? You smell smoke. Okay. You smell like the stale scent of smoke.

[00:43:21] Oh we're back in our house. Yeah you're back in our. Yeah so the whole world's interconnected. It feels like bloodborne all over again. I'll uh I'll meow down. I think we're back in our house. Open the door and find out. Sweet we gotta wager in without having to

[00:43:37] fucking run through this goddamn tape he's bitching about. That's right we don't need a hotel room because we can fucking come up here. Yeah perfect this is great. So let's go up and see do we see it? Looks like a room that was in the boarding house.

[00:43:54] Right how many beds are in this room? Stained one bed stained with a scent of smoke. Free room board moving on. Clip my nose when I sleep that's good. Yeah at least we know where those. It's good for your breathing. Yeah wait I'll take your mouth.

[00:44:11] Other than that kind of a dead end. What floor are we on? Second or third? I believe it is the first floor. Question then odd question odd question. So we kept going through all those areas and it's secret passage.

[00:44:34] Did the guards happen to catch any of those folks who were fleeing? You have not seen anyone that ran away at all. Because you know the door to this room closed free dependence. You know there's at least four cultists that have disappeared on you.

[00:44:53] And we've got at least two other corridors to go down. So yeah come back down. Yeah yeah yeah come back down the corridor. If you step out from the sarcophagus and align yourself 180 degrees from the sarcophagus then left is now the other branch.

[00:45:18] So you can go that way. No we went left we're exploring the left full branch. Correct way of the penis. If you come down the ladder you are facing south to your right is a wall which is also the way you came from. So now we go left.

[00:45:39] To your left is a corridor to the continuum. Yeah that's right we're going down. To your south slightly south. We don't care about that. East is where you came from because the door was in the middle. The door to enter this area was in the middle.

[00:45:55] Doesn't count because it's not luck. Because you guys went northwest. Yeah whatever we're exploring the left side of this place. Way of the penis. Where do you want to go south? For their south. We're continuing on our journey on this left side of the left.

[00:46:09] Left out of the sarcophagus. Okay left. I'll just go and bring you into what is called okay. Left okay. Yeah I just want to get out here so I can start building my firearms. Just want to make a gun so bad. There's probably wood up in that room.

[00:46:31] Break the bed down. Roll initiative. Good wool good wood. Wait wait wait wait wait. Roll initiative. Wait a second no. Perception. No description. No context. No perception. I'll accept it but you better fucking wow me after I roll initiative. That's a lot. You walked into an area.

[00:46:53] Into what? You walked in an area where there are some shelves. Shelves don't require initiative. And that's about it. Shelves don't require initiative. Wait we walked in. How big is the area? Is it open? Is it a room? Do we go through a door? It's a library.

[00:47:10] Passive perceptions. No it's an open area. Passive perception. We come around a corner. Passive perception. If you're exiting the corridor you just went up the ladder in which is facing south to your left. You go over. You walk into what is called one C.

[00:47:29] I don't care what's called. Immerse me. You see skeletal figures. Listen to flans. Skeletal figures. Roll initiative.