Brothel DnD - Out of the Abyss 121

It all comes down to this. Having arrived at the Maze Engine, all that is left is to begin the ritual, summon a whole bunch of demons, be big damn heroes, and save the day. This should be easy, right?

We continue Out of the Abyss, a Dungeons and Dragons campaign.

Starring:

Cody as Kira Truesilver

Schroeder as Ertlan

Lucas as Jaren Everfell

Troy as Trogdor

 

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[00:00:00] The Rancors Brothel presents

[00:00:09] A Dungeons & Dragons Campaign

[00:00:19] How to help us

[00:00:30] How to help us

[00:00:35] You don't notice an effect?

[00:00:37] Okay. Does the magic do what he wants it to do?

[00:00:39] Yes. The spell goes off.

[00:00:41] Good job!

[00:00:42] Thanks.

[00:00:44] It's just there's other effects that happen too.

[00:00:46] Perfect.

[00:00:47] Alrighty.

[00:00:48] Well, that's ready to go.

[00:00:50] Yeah.

[00:00:51] You have plants.

[00:00:52] We do.

[00:00:53] Roll again when you cast a transport.

[00:00:55] I know.

[00:00:56] Yeah.

[00:00:57] Well, he's not going to be ready for another three days.

[00:00:59] So I don't know what you want to do between now and then.

[00:01:01] I don't want to...

[00:01:02] I mean, secure...

[00:01:03] Right now we know where we're going.

[00:01:05] We have it secured.

[00:01:06] We're locking it down.

[00:01:07] I don't see there's any reason.

[00:01:08] Like I said, send the scouts out.

[00:01:10] Have them check the nearest tunnels.

[00:01:12] Have them come back every day.

[00:01:13] That's great.

[00:01:14] These aren't great.

[00:01:15] I kind of want better wild magic things.

[00:01:18] I mean, the thing is if it's a 5% chance,

[00:01:20] you've already fucked it.

[00:01:22] So like, you deserve to get like...

[00:01:24] You deserve to shut your pie hole.

[00:01:26] That's what you deserve.

[00:01:27] Wild magic under sorcerer is like...

[00:01:31] They're not all bad.

[00:01:32] Yeah, yeah, I know.

[00:01:34] Like Schroeder is immune to being drunk for the next...

[00:01:39] Roll me 5d6.

[00:01:41] So he's Schroeder.

[00:01:42] No, I've...

[00:01:46] He's not immune to being drunk.

[00:01:49] Schroeder or his character?

[00:01:52] Schroeder.

[00:01:54] Jeff has heard me through the airwaves.

[00:01:56] Very, very drunk before.

[00:01:58] Probably better to say he hasn't heard you through the airwaves.

[00:02:01] Yeah, I was going to say he passed out mid-combat once.

[00:02:04] Yeah.

[00:02:05] That was a good chance for that.

[00:02:06] I remember doing that one time.

[00:02:08] I don't remember who I was playing computer games with,

[00:02:11] but I passed out in the chair.

[00:02:13] That was back in Divinity Days, wasn't it?

[00:02:15] Yes.

[00:02:16] That was like at this point going on three years ago too.

[00:02:19] Oh shit, yeah it was.

[00:02:21] Okay, so I need...

[00:02:23] You said 66, right?

[00:02:24] 5d6.

[00:02:25] Okay, perfect.

[00:02:26] 5d6.

[00:02:27] Fireball.

[00:02:28] Okay, 15.

[00:02:29] You're going to be immune to being intoxicated for the next two weeks.

[00:02:34] Okay.

[00:02:35] 15 days.

[00:02:36] Cool.

[00:02:37] Woo, fair as res.

[00:02:39] Yeah.

[00:02:41] Some of these fucking longer.

[00:02:44] Alright, well I assume that I would go back a day before he's going to be ready

[00:02:47] so that way I can come back the day it is ready.

[00:02:49] That makes sense.

[00:02:50] Okay, are you doing anything in between or are we skipping forward?

[00:02:53] Skipping forward.

[00:02:54] I mean unless the scouts don't come back or something like that.

[00:02:59] Don't be so excited.

[00:03:00] One, one, one.

[00:03:02] You're good.

[00:03:03] Yeah.

[00:03:04] That was a skill check too, right?

[00:03:06] No.

[00:03:07] No.

[00:03:08] I guess not.

[00:03:09] Okay, I guess spell check.

[00:03:12] So I pop back to Arrage.

[00:03:16] Yeah, he will have it ready for you and are you taking other people back with you

[00:03:22] or is this all you're taking?

[00:03:25] That's a good question.

[00:03:27] I mean since this seems to be the last stand, why not have as many meat chills as possible?

[00:03:33] Spoken like a true general.

[00:03:35] No, I brought an elite squad of...

[00:03:38] I would give a rousing speech for anybody who is willing to make a last stand.

[00:03:45] Make me a charisma or a persuasion.

[00:03:50] I suck at both of them.

[00:03:51] We happy few.

[00:03:52] We banned a brothers.

[00:03:54] You said just charisma or persuasion?

[00:03:56] If you're proficient with persuasion then it's persuasion.

[00:03:59] I am not.

[00:04:00] He that chuds blood with me today shall be my brother.

[00:04:03] Really fucked up.

[00:04:04] You rolled a five.

[00:04:05] You rolled a five, what's your bonus?

[00:04:07] Zero.

[00:04:08] Sweet.

[00:04:09] Charisma was my dumb stat.

[00:04:11] Hey guys, we're gonna go fight.

[00:04:14] 2D20.

[00:04:15] And it'd be a cool idea if you guys would help even though you're probably sacrificing

[00:04:21] what little life you have.

[00:04:22] I rolled double eights.

[00:04:23] So 16.

[00:04:24] You have 16 people out of like 150 who are like, yeah, I'll go stand in front

[00:04:30] of the demon lords for you.

[00:04:32] Pussies.

[00:04:34] Okay.

[00:04:35] Viseran is ready with the, I mean it looks like a black and shrivel heart.

[00:04:43] Says place this when you're ready to set off the ritual and hand you a stone.

[00:04:51] Says contact me and we will start the ritual.

[00:04:54] Okay.

[00:04:55] Is there anything else we're gonna be doing on our side ritual wise?

[00:04:59] No, just let me know when it's in place.

[00:05:02] Where are you placing it?

[00:05:03] Menzabaranzen where you wanted us to.

[00:05:05] Right, where in Menzabaranzen?

[00:05:06] Probably just on the inside like right past where we were.

[00:05:10] Actually, you know what?

[00:05:12] I saw some other plants and source here.

[00:05:15] Plants and source here?

[00:05:17] I know that there's a fungus grove.

[00:05:19] Right.

[00:05:20] I'm gonna say I would base.

[00:05:21] Donny garden.

[00:05:22] Right.

[00:05:23] Where's Don?

[00:05:24] Like I want to make this a believable lie.

[00:05:26] It's the far side of Menzabaranzen from where you came in.

[00:05:29] Okay.

[00:05:30] Are there any big like lush gardens near around source air?

[00:05:37] Around source air, no.

[00:05:39] Okay.

[00:05:40] Any of the other two places that are near source air?

[00:05:43] No.

[00:05:44] Is there a big ass monumental style tree fungus anywhere near the entrance to...

[00:05:51] Like my goal is to try and say this is the closest place that we saw while we were there that near.

[00:05:56] It would be in the richer neighborhoods.

[00:05:59] There would be like groves and people's estates and things like that.

[00:06:04] Gotcha.

[00:06:05] I would just be like, I saw some groves.

[00:06:08] I traveled back from D place where the big groves are on the edge of...

[00:06:12] Yeah, Donny garden.

[00:06:13] I came back from...

[00:06:14] Up on the east side.

[00:06:16] At that deluxe apartment in the sky.

[00:06:18] Yeah, that place.

[00:06:20] Okay.

[00:06:21] So you're making up a good solid lie?

[00:06:24] Yeah.

[00:06:25] Like...

[00:06:26] Roll deception.

[00:06:27] Nope.

[00:06:28] As he handed me the heart.

[00:06:31] He's like standing there with it held out.

[00:06:35] And then I will take it from him before I roll deception.

[00:06:38] That's a 14.

[00:06:43] That's decent.

[00:06:44] That's decent.

[00:06:45] Do you need that?

[00:06:47] He rolled a single digit.

[00:06:51] Oh, did he?

[00:06:52] Okay, never mind.

[00:06:53] We're good.

[00:06:54] I don't need to roll it.

[00:06:57] So that's what we're doing.

[00:07:00] Okay.

[00:07:01] Go team go.

[00:07:02] As you can see, not very many people wanted to go to men's brands.

[00:07:05] Yeah, it's probably a better idea that they don't.

[00:07:08] Well for them...

[00:07:10] Just contact me through the...

[00:07:12] I guess he'd give you a scroll, not a sending stone.

[00:07:15] Hey bro.

[00:07:16] A scroll of sending.

[00:07:17] Okay, gotcha.

[00:07:18] I would take it.

[00:07:19] Yep.

[00:07:20] As though I don't...

[00:07:21] That way I don't burn a spell slot.

[00:07:23] Exactly.

[00:07:24] Yeah.

[00:07:25] You're going to be facing down at least one demon lord.

[00:07:28] Yep.

[00:07:29] Cool.

[00:07:30] Well...

[00:07:31] It can be only one.

[00:07:32] Big helps, huh?

[00:07:33] Yep.

[00:07:34] See you later.

[00:07:35] See you later.

[00:07:36] See you later.

[00:07:37] See you later.

[00:07:38] Okay.

[00:07:39] I need to actually draw some of this shit out so that we can start.

[00:07:43] I think I'm going to have to get a new mat.

[00:07:46] I accidentally bought the giant mat.

[00:07:48] There are nine demon lords, right?

[00:07:51] Not anymore.

[00:07:52] Well, there are nine.

[00:07:54] No, there's way more than that.

[00:07:56] There are?

[00:07:57] Yeah, there's...

[00:07:58] I mean, there's lesser ones.

[00:07:59] Oh, but not me.

[00:08:00] Yeah.

[00:08:01] No, the big...

[00:08:02] The big ones are Demogorgon, Baphomet, Orcus, Yinagoo, Gratzt, Frazer Blue...

[00:08:10] I only count eight.

[00:08:12] Gratzt was in the stone.

[00:08:14] Nope.

[00:08:15] Frazer Blue was in the stone.

[00:08:16] That's what I said.

[00:08:17] Cause you're intact.

[00:08:18] Jublex.

[00:08:19] Jublex and Zycta-moy.

[00:08:20] Zycta-moy.

[00:08:21] Dead.

[00:08:22] Dead.

[00:08:23] And then Gratzt.

[00:08:24] I've got the spider bitch, Loth.

[00:08:27] Loth isn't really a demon.

[00:08:29] I think she's a demon.

[00:08:31] She's a demon lady.

[00:08:33] A demon lass, if you will.

[00:08:35] All right, bitch!

[00:08:38] I was just thinking like, you only have four things here so...

[00:08:42] We've taken care of quite a few of them.

[00:08:45] Mortal Kombat!

[00:08:46] You've taken care of Zycta-moy and...

[00:08:49] Jublex.

[00:08:50] Right, that's two.

[00:08:51] Right.

[00:08:52] Frazer Blooms in the...

[00:08:54] In the gym.

[00:08:55] In the gym.

[00:08:56] The only one who is not represented here is Gratzt.

[00:08:59] And he was the demon who was outside of Grakelstog watching the show.

[00:09:04] Devil, not demon.

[00:09:06] He is technically a devil.

[00:09:07] The devil.

[00:09:09] It's the devil.

[00:09:11] That was a very...

[00:09:13] What's the bad guy in Inspector Gadget?

[00:09:16] I think it's you, Gadget.

[00:09:18] Is it Dr. Claw?

[00:09:20] Yep.

[00:09:21] Not sure how he got his PhD.

[00:09:23] He didn't go to eight years of freaking evil medical school, we call it mystery.

[00:09:31] Oh man.

[00:09:33] I love knockoffs of Blofeld.

[00:09:36] The details of my life are inconsequential.

[00:09:40] D-d-d-d-d-d-d-d.

[00:09:42] I was going to make a bigger...

[00:09:44] Gonna need a bigger bow.

[00:09:45] Well, see you next time.

[00:09:46] No.

[00:09:47] The way work has been, I'm not gonna get anywhere near those machines.

[00:09:51] To do anything personal.

[00:09:55] No, you walk up to your boss and you say,

[00:09:58] Excuse me sir, but your shit needs to stop so that I can have fun with my friends.

[00:10:05] And then after you get fired you have plenty of time to make the map.

[00:10:08] Right?

[00:10:09] Well no, because I need the printer that's there.

[00:10:12] If I get fired.

[00:10:14] It'll take them a while to arrest you after you break in and use the printer after hours.

[00:10:19] That's true.

[00:10:22] Okay, so where are you putting your tower?

[00:10:27] The base of the stairs, right?

[00:10:29] Uh...

[00:10:30] I suppose.

[00:10:31] How wide is the tower again?

[00:10:34] 60, 40 by 40.

[00:10:36] How wide is the platform?

[00:10:38] Up the stairs?

[00:10:40] Yes, the top of the stairs.

[00:10:42] There's 20 feet from the stairs back to the maze engine and then it's 40 foot wide.

[00:10:49] The maze engine is 40 foot wide.

[00:10:51] Yeah, the platform is probably 50.

[00:10:54] Not quite enough.

[00:10:55] It would be cool to just set it on top of...

[00:10:58] It'd be cool to set it on top of the platform in front of the orary,

[00:11:01] but it doesn't sound like that's enough space.

[00:11:04] No.

[00:11:05] Then I would say at the base of the stairs.

[00:11:08] To the side not blocking the stairs?

[00:11:10] No, absolutely blocking the stairs.

[00:11:12] Because we got a front door and a back door, right?

[00:11:15] No, you have a front door and a roof.

[00:11:17] Access.

[00:11:18] That's 20 by 20.

[00:11:20] Man, that is...

[00:11:22] Draw it.

[00:11:23] Fucking big.

[00:11:24] Is there space...?

[00:11:28] Jesus.

[00:11:29] I mean, I feel like blocking it off is not a terrible idea.

[00:11:35] Keeps any big bastards from going up whoever's trying to keep concentration on the maze engine.

[00:11:39] Yeah, makes them go through the fortress.

[00:11:42] And we could have a stand both in the fortress and on top of the fortress.

[00:11:49] Yeah, I like it.

[00:11:54] We're like at the top of the mast watching the ships roll in, you know?

[00:11:59] Bring me my brown pants and all that.

[00:12:02] So you're planning on being inside the tower, somebody's outside on the maze engine?

[00:12:08] Yes.

[00:12:09] I'll pull out a horn and blow my brown note.

[00:12:11] Your pants are brown now.

[00:12:13] Is that the extent of it?

[00:12:15] That's what I've got right now.

[00:12:19] We're gonna have the battle rangers on the ground in a semi-circle.

[00:12:22] Do you have fun?

[00:12:23] Yeah.

[00:12:24] Okay, you going to bed now?

[00:12:26] Or are they just inside the door waiting to bust out?

[00:12:30] That was my idea, yeah.

[00:12:31] Okay, not a bad idea.

[00:12:33] I did have a thing that I've never used in this game that might be useful now.

[00:12:37] I was going to look at my horn.

[00:12:39] Please don't pull your horn out while we're playing.

[00:12:41] Too late.

[00:12:42] I forgot you had a horn.

[00:12:44] Sorry.

[00:12:45] I don't remember what the horn is.

[00:12:48] Been a while.

[00:12:49] It's a horn of brown note and makes them shit themselves.

[00:12:52] No, bring me my brown pants.

[00:12:54] I don't know where it went.

[00:12:56] Maybe I sold it at one point because I wasn't using it.

[00:12:58] I got an amulet for one-time protection against fiends.

[00:13:01] You do.

[00:13:02] Will that help now?

[00:13:04] It's protection versus good and evil specifically fiends.

[00:13:10] Correct.

[00:13:11] Yeah, that would help.

[00:13:13] I'm also considering using that amulet.

[00:13:18] I'm also considering to drink my potion of greater invisibility as well.

[00:13:23] Well, unless you want me to go in with a six-level slot down,

[00:13:26] we're going to take a long rest before this fight.

[00:13:28] Yeah, that's fine.

[00:13:30] Yeah.

[00:13:32] We have time to set up when we want to do it.

[00:13:35] Yep.

[00:13:36] Cute.

[00:13:37] Are you wanting to set the tower in front of the platform or in front of the entrance?

[00:13:43] No, that's not a bad idea, but I'm more worried about...

[00:13:47] So here's the thing, when we kick this on, right,

[00:13:50] I get the sense that this is going to be like a giant Ghostbusters ghost trap or something

[00:13:56] and they may want to prevent whatever's happening from happening.

[00:13:59] Yeah.

[00:14:00] So by putting a tower in the way, we can protect whoever's keeping the thing running.

[00:14:05] I might have something to help.

[00:14:08] I mean, you're assuming that once you pop the ritual,

[00:14:11] it's going to be like the chicken and Peter Griffin seeing each other from across the parking lot

[00:14:16] and they go beat the shit out of each other?

[00:14:18] I'm not assuming that at all.

[00:14:20] I'm hoping that's what happens.

[00:14:22] I'm hoping that's what happens, but for all I know, they're going to go,

[00:14:25] hey, this orary's cool. Let's stop it from returning us to where we don't want to be.

[00:14:31] Or maybe they'll sit down and have a nice cup of tea.

[00:14:34] You want to tell us what your plan is?

[00:14:37] Well, so the Fugitoid said that it's best to not start this thing till after the ritual.

[00:14:45] Right?

[00:14:46] Got what he said?

[00:14:47] Until you're ready to use it.

[00:14:50] Just trying to like, do we start it and then do our ritual and like so like that it's...

[00:14:59] How long does the ritual take for Viseran?

[00:15:02] He said it could, he would tell you it could take hours.

[00:15:11] No, I think a couple of us go out, set the thing, start the ritual.

[00:15:18] Once we push the button, we signal somebody on the tower who then signals, you know,

[00:15:23] whoever's on the tower needs to be our eyes and ears and coordinate everything.

[00:15:28] And we don't start the orary until all the parties show up.

[00:15:36] Sounds like a plan.

[00:15:37] I'm just fearful that the orary will take time to do what it needs to do and can we use that time to...

[00:15:45] Or does it only have a few rounds before it breaks?

[00:15:50] Since we don't know either time frame, let's just start one of them.

[00:15:54] Or does the damn thing move fast enough that the whole rest of the fucking thing falls into the lava?

[00:15:59] Start her up, let's find out.

[00:16:01] I don't know what that hum is.

[00:16:02] I bet it's the water heater.

[00:16:04] Probably.

[00:16:05] I'm of the opinion that because we don't know how long this thing is going to run

[00:16:09] that we don't start the orary until everybody's here.

[00:16:14] Everybody else okay with that idea?

[00:16:16] Yeah.

[00:16:17] Did you have another thing that you wanted to...

[00:16:20] I was mixing two spells up and I think because that thing's too big for the one that's ideal.

[00:16:28] Okay, I think so.

[00:16:30] Go, go, gadget, ritual arm.

[00:16:32] So you're going to place the talisman radio in.

[00:16:36] Yeah, after I've rested.

[00:16:38] Okay, so you're going to rest.

[00:16:39] Yeah.

[00:16:40] Okay, everybody's got the spell slots back.

[00:16:41] Everybody's full health.

[00:16:42] Yep.

[00:16:43] Everybody's good to go.

[00:16:45] Yep.

[00:16:46] You place the talisman, you radio in and you literally sit for hours.

[00:16:55] As you sit, you start to see almost like gathering clouds for a storm.

[00:17:01] The fares rest swirls.

[00:17:04] I mean it looks like the forming of a tornado.

[00:17:08] It builds and builds and builds over hours.

[00:17:12] And after about nine hours you see several swirls and then space opens and roll for initiative.

[00:17:25] It's happening!

[00:17:27] I get advantage on that now, Jeff.

[00:17:30] Oh?

[00:17:31] Feral instinct.

[00:17:35] Maybe I won't have a shit initiative for a change.

[00:17:37] No, you'll have two shit initiatives.

[00:17:40] You son of a bitch.

[00:17:43] He rolled two floors.

[00:17:46] You want to re-roll onto skill check?

[00:17:48] Added the eight to it.

[00:17:50] Oh, that's funny.

[00:17:55] Let's just remind ourselves that Troy is the ultimate fuck up tonight and it'll take a really big fuck up to outdo Troy's fuck up.

[00:18:01] That's all we got to...

[00:18:03] We didn't start any later than we usually do.

[00:18:06] That's actually not wrong.

[00:18:08] We did.

[00:18:10] Yes, yes he is.

[00:18:13] Troy.

[00:18:15] 17.

[00:18:17] Lucas.

[00:18:18] 18.

[00:18:19] Schroeder.

[00:18:20] 19.

[00:18:21] 23.

[00:18:26] That'd be a six, Jeff.

[00:18:29] You old piece of shit.

[00:18:32] I'm going to go upstairs now because my initiative won't be for 87 other characters' turns.

[00:18:37] I'll probably die out there in the middle of the field before I get to take an initiative.

[00:18:40] I didn't realize the casting time on that spell.

[00:18:43] On which spell?

[00:18:44] The one he took.

[00:18:45] Yeah, it's a minute.

[00:18:47] You old...

[00:18:48] We're going to play games where I never rolled again.

[00:18:51] Just roll better.

[00:18:53] Should we place ourselves?

[00:18:56] Okay, I need to know who is going to maintain the maze engine.

[00:19:02] I think it's Lucas' opportunity to fuck something up.

[00:19:06] What about the rub it?

[00:19:08] You don't want me to throw spells and do things?

[00:19:10] You can throw spells.

[00:19:12] You just can't throw concentration spells.

[00:19:14] Yes.

[00:19:15] I mean, it's up to you guys.

[00:19:17] I don't care who does it.

[00:19:18] If it's a concentration theoretically as a wizard...

[00:19:23] With WarCaster, which gives you advantage on concentration checks just in case you take damage.

[00:19:29] You would be the most effective one.

[00:19:32] While it may sound like I was being flippant, which I was...

[00:19:36] It also is tactically the best decision since you guys say I never helped the team out at all

[00:19:41] and just sit back and laugh when it goes to shit.

[00:19:43] Which I still plan on doing.

[00:19:45] I mean, I do have a WarCaster in an AC of 23, but either way.

[00:19:49] Yeah, either way.

[00:19:51] I mean, you're literally the one that rolled to have some understanding of how this thing worked.

[00:19:57] Yeah.

[00:19:58] So it's up to you guys.

[00:20:00] You can do it because you both have...

[00:20:03] You can both hang out up there. I don't care.

[00:20:05] Yeah, I don't know how far back that area is from being able to affect the battlefield.

[00:20:10] You've got 30 feet of stairs and then you've got 20 feet and then the maze engine.

[00:20:14] Okay.

[00:20:15] I just don't have enough map for that.

[00:20:17] So we're looking at 70 feet minimum.

[00:20:20] No, 30.

[00:20:22] So 50 plus 40.

[00:20:24] Right?

[00:20:25] So 90.

[00:20:26] So 20 back. 20 feet into the maze engine.

[00:20:29] 30 feet of stairs.

[00:20:31] 30 feet of stairs.

[00:20:33] Another 20 feet back.

[00:20:35] And then another 20 feet into the maze engine.

[00:20:37] So that's 70.

[00:20:39] Yep.

[00:20:40] Plus the 40 feet past the fortress because the fortress is 40 feet.

[00:20:45] Right.

[00:20:46] That's where the... this is where the stairs start.

[00:20:49] Yeah.

[00:20:50] So 30 feet back from there and then 20 feet and then 20 feet.

[00:20:53] Right.

[00:20:54] So...

[00:20:55] Yeah, put somebody out of the fight.

[00:20:57] 110 feet.

[00:20:58] It does put somebody out of the fight.

[00:21:00] To affect anything.

[00:21:01] Not necessarily because you're sitting 30 feet up and then another 20 feet up.

[00:21:07] You're 50 feet up which is taller than this tower.

[00:21:09] So you do have a line of sight.

[00:21:11] Okay.

[00:21:13] So I'm setting the tower in front of it.

[00:21:14] It doesn't do anything anyways.

[00:21:16] Well, it prevents them from going up the stairs towards it.

[00:21:19] Oh.

[00:21:20] I mean that can run around it.

[00:21:22] Where am I physically?

[00:21:23] Where's my character physically standing?

[00:21:25] They're demon lords.

[00:21:26] I'm sure the tower...

[00:21:27] Are you... where are you going to be?

[00:21:29] Maybe they're like lemmings.

[00:21:30] Are you going to be on the maze engine?

[00:21:31] I thought I was maintaining the machine, yeah.

[00:21:33] Charter?

[00:21:34] No.

[00:21:35] I don't care where you are.

[00:21:36] You tell me where you're at.

[00:21:37] Well if I have to turn it on I have to be in front of the buttons and shit, right?

[00:21:43] Somebody there might have missed.

[00:21:44] It doesn't have to be you.

[00:21:46] You guys need to make this decision while I go pee.

[00:21:52] I don't know how effective I would be with being any help for you guys if I am up there.

[00:22:00] So what do we think is going to be...

[00:22:03] Why can't the robot do it?

[00:22:05] That's what I thought.

[00:22:06] Okay, have the modron do it.

[00:22:08] Yeah, have the...

[00:22:11] I would think one of us should do it.

[00:22:13] Okay.

[00:22:14] I'll do it.

[00:22:15] Then one of you do it.

[00:22:16] Yeah, I mean I'm okay with doing it.

[00:22:18] I'm just saying like what's more helpful, me healing or him doing damage for you guys out fighting whatever the fucks left.

[00:22:29] Don't know.

[00:22:30] Are you thinking you're going to be too far away to do any...

[00:22:33] With damage spells that I have, yeah.

[00:22:36] For the most, I mean because I've got like light which is 30 feet.

[00:22:40] I've got spell snappers so I can double my range.

[00:22:43] Lightning bolt is 100 foot line.

[00:22:45] I mean most of your range of your spells is probably what 60 feet?

[00:22:48] That's not true.

[00:22:49] I guess I can hit ice storms from 300 feet away.

[00:22:52] I mean like I said based on what I understand of your skills that puts you out of the ability,

[00:22:57] that puts you out of the range of a lot of damage that they can theoretically throw while also still being able to throw it.

[00:23:03] Like I said I was not being flippant.

[00:23:05] You make the most tactical, the tactically the best choice.

[00:23:08] That's what but again where am I physically standing on this map?

[00:23:11] You're basically right there.

[00:23:13] You're 70 feet past.

[00:23:15] I'm behind our tower.

[00:23:16] Yes.

[00:23:17] You're 70 feet past.

[00:23:18] Can I see over our tower?

[00:23:19] Yes, you explained that as well.

[00:23:20] Okay.

[00:23:21] Because you're 70 feet back and 50 feet up.

[00:23:24] Correct.

[00:23:25] Okay.

[00:23:26] Then we will do that.

[00:23:29] And while I was resting I was imparting the knowledge of how to use the fucking thing.

[00:23:33] There we go.

[00:23:34] I don't know who actually goes first but...

[00:23:36] I think I do at least out of our roles.

[00:23:39] So the real question is where are the three of us going to be?

[00:23:42] You can be on the roof or are you running out with the battle ragers?

[00:23:44] No, no.

[00:23:45] The battle ragers and I are standing in front of the door.

[00:23:47] Oh, not inside to burst out?

[00:23:50] Well, I mean depends on what happens but you know...

[00:23:53] I assume we all sat there and put the stone down and went okay.

[00:23:56] And then waited some more.

[00:23:58] Then went and had a chicken sandwich and waited some more.

[00:24:01] I mean nine hours is a long fucking time to wait.

[00:24:04] But yeah, I would assume we're ready to bust out the door.

[00:24:07] Cause I had planned on hitting you with the...

[00:24:09] If that was going to be the case with our setup.

[00:24:11] I was planning on hitting you with the old trusty.

[00:24:13] And should I be with you guys or should I be on the tower?

[00:24:17] I mean unless somebody really is launching things then there's no reason to be on the tower

[00:24:22] except to be on the tower to signal shit back and forth to Lucas.

[00:24:25] Cause he's quite a ways away.

[00:24:27] I mean if your spells will reach there's no reason for you to get down there in a fight

[00:24:30] unless you absolutely have to.

[00:24:31] Those are the ones I've rolled an attack with though.

[00:24:34] I'm going to be doing more save.

[00:24:36] I'll be doing significantly more healing with touch heals than I will.

[00:24:40] Some of my ones of saves are only like a 60 foot range so I may not reach with those.

[00:24:46] Just see what happens.

[00:24:47] For all I know they come out and they smash a shit out of our tower in about 5 seconds.

[00:24:50] That's also true.

[00:24:51] And I've also got one spell that will reach.

[00:24:54] That's it.

[00:24:59] Lucas is minding the Cyberman.

[00:25:01] Like are you more of a melee?

[00:25:03] No.

[00:25:05] I mean I can hit decent but I hit better probably with my spells.

[00:25:11] So then maybe being on top of the tower just wouldn't be a bad spot for you to be.

[00:25:15] Lucas is with the Cyberman.

[00:25:18] Troy's on top of the tower.

[00:25:20] The rest of us are ready to throw open the door and rush out into combat as needed.

[00:25:25] And I'll probably float behind the main line.

[00:25:28] You would have a hard time leading a charge of battle ragers.

[00:25:32] I just mean like I'm not going to try it like you know be at their feet.

[00:25:36] You know what I mean.

[00:25:37] You good Hefe?

[00:25:38] Yep just checking some.

[00:25:42] Okay Lucas is on the maze engine.

[00:25:44] On the tower.

[00:25:45] Troy is on the tower.

[00:25:47] The rest of us are going out the front.

[00:25:49] Going out the front.

[00:25:50] Okay so we have initiative rolled.

[00:25:52] Yep.

[00:25:55] At this point you see portals forming in the fares rest all around this chamber.

[00:26:02] Some big some small some fairly shifting huge.

[00:26:08] Yeah it'll be sure to turn first.

[00:26:12] Prior to them coming out.

[00:26:14] Yep round one the portals open.

[00:26:18] Okay then I'll haste the barbarian.

[00:26:22] That's a leveled spell so bonus action shalavly.

[00:26:27] I can't cast anything overly useful at that point.

[00:26:32] I'll have to all those tokens.

[00:26:36] Yeah so just hasting the barbarian bonus action shalaly and waiting.

[00:26:41] Okay Lucas.

[00:26:45] Just so that I'm aware at what point are we am I supposed to concentrate on the machine is that right away or is that later on like what I was one I'm sure I'm understanding.

[00:26:55] When you turn it on you have to concentrate to keep it running.

[00:26:58] Yes but when do I turn it on?

[00:27:01] Well he just said that they will come through in round one it's just hasn't got to their turn yet.

[00:27:06] No the portals open on round one.

[00:27:09] Okay well we will signal you.

[00:27:11] Okay so should I do something else that has concentration until then?

[00:27:14] Because I can.

[00:27:15] Is it useful?

[00:27:16] It's a bunch of radiant damage if that helps.

[00:27:19] We don't see anybody yet.

[00:27:20] Yeah but if I hold it where it's at as soon as they walk into it they take it.

[00:27:24] I mean sure.

[00:27:25] Pick a portal and throw a bear trap of radiant damage on it.

[00:27:31] I'm okay with that.

[00:27:32] It's a 30 foot radius sphere I could put it like in the middle somewhere that's not going to hit you guys.

[00:27:38] Or just directly under wherever one of the portals is coming out.

[00:27:41] That could work.

[00:27:42] How far what's the range on it?

[00:27:43] 120 feet.

[00:27:44] Is there a big ass portal somewhere within 120 feet Jeff?

[00:27:47] I mean there are literally portals opening up all over the place.

[00:27:51] Okay.

[00:27:52] Pick a portal you like Lucas and throw it under that.

[00:27:55] The biggest one.

[00:27:57] Okay.

[00:27:58] I mean if you're doing a 30 foot radius sphere it's going to be under multiple portals.

[00:28:02] Yeah yeah.

[00:28:03] That's what I'm thinking.

[00:28:04] If I can get multiple creatures into it that's what I want to do.

[00:28:07] Right.

[00:28:08] So let's do that thing.

[00:28:09] Okay so you're putting it right here out in front of the tower?

[00:28:12] Yeah as long as these guys are not in it.

[00:28:13] Nope they're inside the tower until they say otherwise.

[00:28:16] So oh hang on hold on to that.

[00:28:18] Is Kira like at the door like peeking out the door?

[00:28:22] So you see a...

[00:28:24] It's a second level right?

[00:28:25] You all see a damn greenish light spread within a 30 foot radius.

[00:28:29] Neat.

[00:28:30] What spell is that?

[00:28:31] Sickening Radiance.

[00:28:32] Really?

[00:28:33] I don't know that one.

[00:28:35] Can you see it?

[00:28:37] Anything else?

[00:28:38] No that was basically me preparing what to do.

[00:28:41] Try.

[00:28:42] He's already casted, he's already winning.

[00:28:44] It's also not a concentration spell?

[00:28:46] Oh okay.

[00:28:47] Mine don't do that.

[00:28:48] Oh my god Lucas read it better than Charter did.

[00:28:51] Well it just said duration up to 10 minutes.

[00:28:54] I think I can move it too if I need it to.

[00:28:56] It's as soon as they move into it.

[00:28:58] So as soon as they drop down they're in it.

[00:29:01] I'm just making sure.

[00:29:02] It does say whenever a creature enters it.

[00:29:05] When a creature moves into the spells area for the first time on a turn or starts a turn there.

[00:29:10] Yep that's why it's wanted to lay it like a trap.

[00:29:12] Yeah take a con.

[00:29:13] Con saves.

[00:29:14] And it suffers one level of exhaustion.

[00:29:19] Yep 40-10 radiant and a level of exhaustion on a field save.

[00:29:23] Go ahead and roll a 40-10 just so I have that number in my mind.

[00:29:27] In my mind for the constitution save.

[00:29:30] For each creature.

[00:29:32] I'm not rolling all those.

[00:29:35] In your head.

[00:29:37] Passes a con save.

[00:29:41] As it say half.

[00:29:43] The creature must succeed a con saving throw or take 40-10 radiant damage.

[00:29:47] It's an important distinction.

[00:29:49] This light makes it impossible for the creature to be.

[00:29:51] No it does not specify that it takes half.

[00:29:53] Okay then it does not.

[00:29:54] So if it succeeds it succeeds again.

[00:29:57] What level is this spell?

[00:29:58] Four.

[00:29:59] Fourth level.

[00:30:00] Evocation.

[00:30:01] Interesting.

[00:30:02] I see a spell.

[00:30:03] I'm just curious.

[00:30:04] I don't know what it is.

[00:30:05] Where'd it come from?

[00:30:06] It's the green card.

[00:30:07] What books that I don't remember.

[00:30:08] But I have a card for it.

[00:30:10] It might have been out of Xanathars.

[00:30:12] I don't know.

[00:30:13] Yeah.

[00:30:14] It's got to be either Xanathars cards.

[00:30:16] Oh they are Xanathars cards.

[00:30:17] Okay.

[00:30:18] I believe that is the case.

[00:30:20] The reason I was confused is my cards don't have the C symbol.

[00:30:23] Oh yeah.

[00:30:24] It says concentration next to it.

[00:30:26] Yeah.

[00:30:30] Doing anything round one Troy?

[00:30:32] I cast C invisibility.

[00:30:34] Okay.

[00:30:35] Is that a good one?

[00:30:36] That's not a bad one.

[00:30:37] Yeah.

[00:30:38] It looks like save it just saves.

[00:30:40] What's also cool about his is if they fail the con save, they've got, they emit dim greener

[00:30:47] slide and it makes them impossible for the creature to benefit from being invisible.

[00:30:53] Sweet.

[00:30:54] 31 total for the damage.

[00:30:56] Damn.

[00:30:57] Nice.

[00:30:58] Radiant damage.

[00:30:59] I like it.

[00:31:00] I rolled two 9s, a 10 and a 3.

[00:31:02] So I can't complain.

[00:31:03] Best thing I'm going to do this whole fight guys.

[00:31:06] I can do other things.

[00:31:07] I can do other things.

[00:31:08] I can do other things that don't have concentration.

[00:31:11] I just wanted to try to level.

[00:31:14] I wanted to see if I could just start to hit some things as soon as they popped in.

[00:31:18] No, it's a good call.

[00:31:19] Yeah.

[00:31:20] It's a good call.

[00:31:22] All good.

[00:31:23] No, that's actually very good.

[00:31:26] Anything else Troy?

[00:31:28] Nope.

[00:31:29] Okay.

[00:31:30] Next round, you see bodies pouring out of these.

[00:31:36] Do I not get a turn?

[00:31:38] Jeff?

[00:31:39] Yeah, I guess you would.

[00:31:41] All the way at the bottom.

[00:31:43] Sorry, I missed you.

[00:31:45] Protection from fiends.

[00:31:47] It's a good call.

[00:31:49] Like old grumpy fat guys with bad knees.

[00:31:53] I activate my amulet, my one time use.

[00:31:56] Yeah, I forgot we had that.

[00:31:58] Now seems like a good time to use it.

[00:32:00] It does.

[00:32:01] Anything else?

[00:32:03] I'm going to keep the potion of greater invisibility at hand, but I'm not going to use it yet.

[00:32:07] Okay.

[00:32:08] Next round, you see bodies start pouring out of these portals.

[00:32:14] You see dozens fall into your area and just burst into flames before they ever hit the ground.

[00:32:21] Nice.

[00:32:22] Metal as shit.

[00:32:23] Others that don't burst into flames and others that burst into flames and are just fine after

[00:32:29] that.

[00:32:30] But you nuke a ton of them as they're coming into this area.

[00:32:34] Nice.

[00:32:35] Are any of them these demon lords?

[00:32:38] Yeah, you nuke a demon lord with 31 damage.

[00:32:41] I might send him.

[00:32:43] Sadly the demon lords are spawning out further.

[00:32:46] Oh, of course they are.

[00:32:48] Convenient.

[00:32:49] Real fucking convenient.

[00:32:51] Oh, I mean we can have these guys duke it out and everything like that, but I figure it'd

[00:32:58] be more entertaining if you guys do it.

[00:33:01] We should have pulled out that wrestling RPG.

[00:33:03] So question though.

[00:33:05] There is another one that's missing.

[00:33:08] Why?

[00:33:09] Yes, that is a good point.

[00:33:10] You see other than the one on the gym.

[00:33:14] Right.

[00:33:15] Grats.

[00:33:16] Whoever's got that gym, you feel your pack get lighter.

[00:33:20] Right?

[00:33:21] The stone just lands out there somewhere.

[00:33:23] It does.

[00:33:24] In the midst of all these bodies, you see a black gem just plinked down onto the ground.

[00:33:31] You see a huge red winged skull covered creature with a wand that is coated in green flames

[00:33:44] land to one side of the of the tower.

[00:33:49] You know that this is Orcus.

[00:33:52] You see Yinagoo who you met earlier land on the other side.

[00:33:56] You see Demogorgon and you see Baphomet who is a giant demonic minotaur.

[00:34:02] They all land kind of spread out facing each other.

[00:34:06] Peter Griffin and the chicken across the parking lot.

[00:34:08] Ding ding ding.

[00:34:10] Are these like to scale with them with at least in two degree in comparison with each other?

[00:34:17] The only ones that really aren't are Demogorgon because he's supposed to be huge.

[00:34:24] But I bought this off of Etsy and I didn't realize until I said they're on the grid

[00:34:29] that oh shit, that's four spaces.

[00:34:31] Baphomet, I didn't make the miniature big enough.

[00:34:34] He's supposed to be huge, I think.

[00:34:36] So they're all huge.

[00:34:37] Basically.

[00:34:38] You could put a coaster underneath them if you needed.

[00:34:40] Where's Gratzt?

[00:34:41] That is a good question.

[00:34:45] As everything starts pouring out, you don't see one.

[00:34:47] Do you have a good answer?

[00:34:48] I do.

[00:34:51] Not one that I'm going to give you but as you're pondering that you could make me

[00:34:57] in our counter check.

[00:34:59] Can we all make those?

[00:35:02] 22.

[00:35:03] 22.

[00:35:05] Do you remember when we were discussing the demon lords?

[00:35:11] Gratzt was a devil that took over part of the abyss.

[00:35:16] This summons demons.

[00:35:19] Okay.

[00:35:20] Well, it makes sense.

[00:35:22] It can't fix everything.

[00:35:23] How would the devil get here in the first place then?

[00:35:27] DM Fiat.

[00:35:29] Gotcha.

[00:35:31] Okay.

[00:35:32] In all honesty, I don't remember seeing why Gratzt is not summoned by this but he is

[00:35:38] specifically not.

[00:35:39] Gotcha.

[00:35:40] Immortal combat.

[00:35:41] That's the reason that I assumed.

[00:35:44] You got a D5 in that?

[00:35:46] Here?

[00:35:47] Mm-hmm.

[00:35:48] Should.

[00:35:49] Can I borrow it?

[00:35:53] It's either that or no, that D5 is good.

[00:35:56] I got some stuff from Goodman Games actually, Jeff.

[00:36:00] Oh yeah?

[00:36:01] D7s for people.

[00:36:03] Nice.

[00:36:04] I got a sweet bumper sticker.

[00:36:07] I want that.

[00:36:08] I really want that.

[00:36:10] Maybe not.

[00:36:11] That will go in on my car.

[00:36:13] No, that's a five.

[00:36:14] That's a five.

[00:36:15] What does it say?

[00:36:17] Why don't you roll it?

[00:36:18] He did.

[00:36:19] Do you even spell burn bro?

[00:36:21] I like that.

[00:36:23] Deuce.

[00:36:24] Various hex and grid papers.

[00:36:29] Oh man, does somebody end up being the gym then?

[00:36:35] Oh shit.

[00:36:37] Sweet.

[00:36:39] Lucas, roll that D5.

[00:36:42] Actually roll a D4 now.

[00:36:44] Oh D4 now.

[00:36:46] Big ol' one.

[00:36:49] That's a...

[00:36:51] Fuck yeah, that's the one I wanted.

[00:36:55] Roll a D3 shooter.

[00:36:56] Pretty, pretty on one.

[00:36:59] On call.

[00:37:01] Sorry, Grady.

[00:37:03] Orcus is the best one, like 5,000%.

[00:37:06] Even.

[00:37:08] No, I mean roll it and see if it's even or odd.

[00:37:11] It's odd.

[00:37:12] It's odd.

[00:37:13] It's 13.

[00:37:14] I'm a gem.

[00:37:15] You're lucky because...

[00:37:20] That'd have been awesome.

[00:37:21] People at home, Jeff has handed us each character sheet or stat block and the last

[00:37:26] one stated, you are stuck in a gem, you just watch.

[00:37:30] And none of us got that.

[00:37:31] None of them got that one.

[00:37:32] I'm disappointed.

[00:37:33] So I just get to watch.

[00:37:36] We're going to attach these guys to your initiative.

[00:37:41] Cool.

[00:37:42] On your turn you'll have your action and I'm not giving you the full stat block.

[00:37:50] I'm assuming that these guys would run at each other and just try and tear each

[00:37:54] other's throats out.

[00:37:56] Just so their powers wouldn't work on each other.

[00:37:59] So they wouldn't bother with them.

[00:38:00] We definitely don't have hit points.

[00:38:02] Am I on something missing them?

[00:38:04] Nope, you don't.

[00:38:07] That would have been funny to be a gem.

[00:38:10] As soon as you said 5, I'm like, somebody's a gem.

[00:38:16] Alright, well, shorter at the highest.

[00:38:19] Just kind of gets kicked around by accident during the whole thing.

[00:38:24] No, actually you guys see these these demons pouring in all all different kinds of

[00:38:30] demons.

[00:38:31] You see a ton of like mains and what's the other one dretches just be obliterated as

[00:38:39] they land in Lucas's spell.

[00:38:41] You see the gem land and a garistro demon drops on its ass on this gem and

[00:38:48] just shatters it.

[00:38:53] So just to point out, Shredder did have another 16 to 20 people.

[00:38:57] I imagine we have them maybe up on top of the tower with Troy just launching arrows or whatever.

[00:39:02] Okay, Troy, you have your miniature place yourself on on top of the tower.

[00:39:14] I really need those bags of tokens because I need some for you guys and I need some for me.

[00:39:21] Are they in your car?

[00:39:22] Okay, sorry guys.

[00:39:24] How dare you?

[00:39:26] Plus is there what is this number?

[00:39:31] Average.

[00:39:32] Okay, do we just have the average?

[00:39:34] No, you roll.

[00:39:35] It's just to make it easier for running it.

[00:39:37] If you are a DM, you just take that number because that's statistically the most likely number.

[00:39:42] Are we going off our stats for like saving throws and shit?

[00:39:46] I'm going to imagine our saving throws are going to be so regardless that it's not going to matter.

[00:39:52] But I think it would matter.

[00:39:54] No, not against each other.

[00:39:55] Should we chill touch at a 17th level?

[00:40:01] Why would you be making chill touches at the 17th level?

[00:40:04] Because that's one of my things.

[00:40:08] Because I imagine like I said, I don't know what these saves are but I imagine that they get like...

[00:40:13] Well, I don't know what everybody else's sheet looks like.

[00:40:16] I assume it looks similar to mine but...

[00:40:18] I mean I have no stats.

[00:40:19] It's all...

[00:40:20] No, he's...

[00:40:21] He's given you your actions.

[00:40:28] He's not happy.

[00:40:29] Time is it?

[00:40:30] I'm going to have his feed.

[00:40:32] I wonder what my...

[00:40:33] While Jeff is up there, do any of you want me to look at your character sheets to tell you what you do or are you good?

[00:40:38] Because I know most of you have not read D&D stat blocks before for monsters.

[00:40:42] I mean if...

[00:40:44] I just thought I'd ask.

[00:40:45] Saves aren't going to be a thing that I basically have two things to do.

[00:40:48] Okay.

[00:40:49] I mean spell attacks.

[00:40:51] In fairness, once we all walk in there, each of us has to take a saving throw versus my personal spell but it probably won't make a difference.

[00:40:59] I just don't know what my plus is to a ranged spell attack.

[00:41:03] Motion was detected at my back door.

[00:41:05] I don't doubt it. It's a fat guy walking by there.

[00:41:08] That son of a bitch!

[00:41:10] Fuckin' creeper.

[00:41:12] Oh!

[00:41:13] Okay, what are your questions?

[00:41:15] What my modifier is for a ranged spell attack.

[00:41:19] You shouldn't need to worry about it.

[00:41:22] Taste of Undeath. Orcas cast Chill Touch at a 17th level.

[00:41:26] Oh, okay.

[00:41:27] It's one of my legendary actions.

[00:41:29] Right. And we're going to figure that out.

[00:41:31] Okay.

[00:41:35] We're not all doing legendary actions.

[00:41:37] You guys are going to roll off in between turns.

[00:41:42] One person gets a legendary action.

[00:41:45] Party, Pooper.

[00:41:47] It's one of my attacks.

[00:41:49] If Troy hadn't been so late, we could have done more legendary actions but now we're on an economy. Rationing.

[00:41:58] I think because I have the lowest initiative, I should get Prime Consideration for all legendary actions. That's just what I think.

[00:42:06] You will if you roll high enough. Do you guys want blue or do you want yellow?

[00:42:11] Blue is for bitches.

[00:42:13] Sure.

[00:42:14] So you get blue.

[00:42:21] That's fine because yellow is for cowards.

[00:42:23] Jeff?

[00:42:25] Whatever.

[00:42:28] You said you were throwing a handful of guys on the roof of the tower?

[00:42:32] Yeah.

[00:42:33] Like ranged guys? What are you doing?

[00:42:35] Well, he got six.

[00:42:36] I assume we're making them ranged.

[00:42:38] He got 16 random volunteers.

[00:42:39] I knew we had ground fighters.

[00:42:41] How many are you putting up here?

[00:42:43] 16 of them.

[00:42:44] Yeah, I mean I would put them all up there.

[00:42:46] Okay, we'll assume that's 16.

[00:42:48] Yep, definitely looks like 16 from here.

[00:42:51] Well see, the way I'm thinking of this, I'm not playing 36 different characters for you guys.

[00:42:59] I'm going to give each of your characters a reaction each round.

[00:43:04] Okay, I'm going to give these characters.

[00:43:07] No, your characters.

[00:43:09] Once per round one of you can use that reaction.

[00:43:14] Once it's used, it's used for the round.

[00:43:17] You can either displace a hit, somebody dives in front of you and takes a hit for you.

[00:43:23] Or you can heal 2d6 damage.

[00:43:26] Okay.

[00:43:27] Okay.

[00:43:28] Okay?

[00:43:29] And that's what your minions are doing.

[00:43:32] On the demons' turns, they're going to fight everybody around them.

[00:43:39] And we will, one of you guys can roll an attack roll.

[00:43:43] I will roll an attack roll whoever wins.

[00:43:46] They're going to lose people.

[00:43:48] Reasonable?

[00:43:49] Sure.

[00:43:50] Okay.

[00:43:51] We'll find out after it happens.

[00:43:53] We're talking about minion versus minion is what you mean.

[00:43:55] Yes.

[00:43:56] Got ya.

[00:43:58] Some of it, it's not going to be minions.

[00:44:00] There's bigger demons falling in here too.

[00:44:03] Right.

[00:44:04] It's a tower defense game, guys.

[00:44:09] Aw shit, we should have upgraded!

[00:44:13] Is that Castle game called?

[00:44:15] Castle Panic?

[00:44:17] Castle Panic.

[00:44:18] I prefer Star Trek Panic.

[00:44:19] I think it's cooler, but yes.

[00:44:21] They have a Castle Panic Deluxe now.

[00:44:26] And the castle itself just looked like ridiculous.

[00:44:30] I can't even imagine how it plays, but it's deluxe.

[00:44:34] This is when that playing Castle Crashers huh?

[00:44:37] Oh there are demons on top of the tower.

[00:44:39] They're falling all over the place.

[00:44:41] Okay.

[00:44:42] Again, I'm not rolling for them.

[00:44:47] I just want everybody to be aware that this shit's here.

[00:44:50] It's going on.

[00:44:51] There are literally thousands of demons crashing into this chamber.

[00:44:56] Like, outside of his area there's like mains and dretches piling up on each other.

[00:45:04] They can't even do anything.

[00:45:05] They're just ripping each other to shreds because they're that deeply piled.

[00:45:10] You see some of them falling beyond where you're at, falling right into the lava.

[00:45:15] It's all around here.

[00:45:18] Oh, do me.

[00:45:19] Fuck it.

[00:45:20] I missed it.

[00:45:23] You're in the middle of fairs rest.

[00:45:25] Oh right.

[00:45:26] Oh man, your left toe gets twice the size for another 20 minutes.

[00:45:31] Bummer.

[00:45:32] Trying to think if I'm forgetting anything else.

[00:45:34] I'd like a cinematic moment.

[00:45:36] Okay.

[00:45:37] We need Bruce Buffer here for a second.

[00:45:40] It's time.

[00:45:42] I just imagine at this point because it's Kira who has ostensibly made it through

[00:45:48] every episode.

[00:45:49] Yep.

[00:45:50] Who despite being the goddamn wall and holding the door every fucking episode continues to

[00:45:57] live.

[00:45:58] She just kills herself.

[00:45:59] This goddamn CTE times a thousand is going to get some sort of epic Aragorn moment

[00:46:07] where she swings the door open, screams for Mithril Hall, and then 20 battle ragers

[00:46:12] wade out with brass rocks into the biggest goddamn fight of demons they have ever

[00:46:17] seen in their lives.

[00:46:18] Because that's what's going to happen.

[00:46:20] I don't know if the Gutbuster Brigade has some sort of cry, but I assume that is the rallying

[00:46:27] cry that is taken up before they launch into the fracas.

[00:46:30] I can't remember if they have one or not.

[00:46:33] Ziggy Zoggy.

[00:46:34] Ziggy Zoggy.

[00:46:35] Oh, oh, oh.

[00:46:36] I mean that's not bad.

[00:46:38] That's it.

[00:46:39] So anyway, yeah, that's her cinematic moment.

[00:46:46] That's her cinematic moment, throwing open the door and letting loose the battle ragers.

[00:46:50] I know when Pwint used to charge in the battle he would yell Mckang for Brunner, but I don't

[00:46:57] remember the rest of them.

[00:47:00] What else do we need to do?

[00:47:03] I just want to make sure I'm not missing anything.

[00:47:05] Okay, top of the round, demons fall all over the place.

[00:47:09] Lucas, you are on the maze engine.

[00:47:13] Somewhere back here, yeah.

[00:47:14] Right.

[00:47:15] With the modron.

[00:47:16] The modron is helping you out.

[00:47:18] You're in the tower.

[00:47:19] Throw the lever, Cronk.

[00:47:20] You're in the tower.

[00:47:21] You're on top of the tower.

[00:47:23] Just making sure I'm clear on everything.

[00:47:26] Why do we have that lever?

[00:47:29] Shrota, you're up.

[00:47:34] Are we going to say the doors are thrown open?

[00:47:37] I mean it's cinematic as fuck.

[00:47:39] I'll say I'm the one holding the door.

[00:47:41] I'm not running out first.

[00:47:44] Like I said, if Kira after 145 fucking episodes of this and the one person who's trying to have

[00:47:50] at least some sort of consistent storyline throughout that hasn't died yet, TBD, like

[00:47:57] I get the sense that she's got this rallying cry.

[00:48:01] This is it.

[00:48:02] This is what ends the demon menace in the Underdark.

[00:48:06] You dwarves, you 20 battle ragers have an opportunity to do what no dwarf has done before.

[00:48:11] You are going to fight against literal demon lords.

[00:48:15] They're coming here and their only goal is to squash everything you love and care for.

[00:48:20] This is for bigger than Brunner, this is bigger than Mithral Hall, this is for the entire Underdark.

[00:48:25] Do not stop until everything out there stops moving or you die.

[00:48:30] Then she kicks open the fucking door and has to wait till goddamn bottom of the ground.

[00:48:35] Because Jeff is a fuck.

[00:48:38] Shrota.

[00:48:40] Door's open.

[00:48:42] I cast spiritual weapon out the door.

[00:48:45] Roll 2D20.

[00:48:47] Oh shit.

[00:48:48] Okay.

[00:48:52] You only got to worry about a 1, I think if it's what I think it is.

[00:48:55] Okay, so then I'm good.

[00:48:56] So spiritual weapon goes out 60 feet.

[00:48:59] With all the shitstorm that the ritual is causing.

[00:49:02] You find things to hit.

[00:49:03] Fair's Rest is going to be even more detrimental.

[00:49:07] Okay.

[00:49:09] So that's out there.

[00:49:11] Do you have something to market?

[00:49:13] Where are you going with it?

[00:49:16] One of the goddamn tokens you have.

[00:49:19] There's blue tokens right there.

[00:49:21] I've just put something that stands out.

[00:49:24] Actually, let's go with a D4 not a D8.

[00:49:26] I'll be needing that in here in a little bit.

[00:49:28] Where are we going with it?

[00:49:29] Just straight out in the middle.

[00:49:31] Actually, to the left towards Tim Gorgon.

[00:49:35] The goal is that we don't want them going up the stairs.

[00:49:38] As much as the battle ragers and stuff are going to wage into battle,

[00:49:42] we want to protect the tower.

[00:49:44] We don't want fucking things.

[00:49:46] Just slice the first fucking thing that you see coming out of the door.

[00:49:49] Right there.

[00:49:51] You'd have to have it out here so you have to find a site.

[00:49:54] But just start fucking swinging.

[00:49:56] So then...

[00:49:58] Yeah, you're hacking at me.

[00:50:00] I'll also step out.

[00:50:02] Okay.

[00:50:03] Fuck it, I've cast Shalely. Let's go.

[00:50:06] So...

[00:50:07] You already spent one bonus action.

[00:50:10] I already used Shalely on the last turn.

[00:50:12] Okay.

[00:50:13] Yeah, because I cast haste and then bonus action Shalely.

[00:50:15] Gotcha.

[00:50:16] Cool.

[00:50:17] So then I'll smack with the spiritual weapon.

[00:50:22] Sure.

[00:50:23] Going for a big one or are you going for a little one?

[00:50:26] Uh, I'm going for a big one.

[00:50:29] Okay.

[00:50:30] Cool.

[00:50:31] The big one comes for you.

[00:50:33] Oh, that was with my...

[00:50:35] That wasn't with the Shalely.

[00:50:36] Oh, I thought you were hitting with the Shalely.

[00:50:37] I'm sorry.

[00:50:38] No, it was my...

[00:50:39] Okay, cool.

[00:50:40] Well, I don't care what your spiritual weapon's doing.

[00:50:41] Oh, okay.

[00:50:42] Your spiritual weapon is wading into a mob.

[00:50:45] It's going to hit something.

[00:50:46] Okay.

[00:50:47] I'm good with that.

[00:50:48] Okay.

[00:50:49] Well, if I see something big over here and I'm walking out,

[00:50:51] bring that fucking thing over to me.

[00:50:53] Or not.

[00:50:54] You can sit there.

[00:50:55] I'll wait.

[00:50:56] Don't walk into that green light.

[00:50:57] I hit it with my Shalely.

[00:50:58] Just don't walk into that green light.

[00:51:00] You're fine.

[00:51:01] So you can bring it back in.

[00:51:02] We'll do exactly what we did.

[00:51:03] Okay.

[00:51:04] Yeah, that's fine.

[00:51:05] Yep.

[00:51:06] And I smacked it with my Shalely.

[00:51:07] You're about to have 21 of your best dwarf friends

[00:51:10] come piling out of that door any second now.

[00:51:12] Hang on a minute.

[00:51:13] They're small.

[00:51:14] They could duck around.

[00:51:16] Did you see the picture of them?

[00:51:18] No.

[00:51:19] They're like...

[00:51:20] Their armor is covered in spikes.

[00:51:21] Their fists are covered...

[00:51:22] Like, they...

[00:51:23] Think Rhino but just...

[00:51:26] Rhino with all spikes.

[00:51:28] Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:51:29] So, I mean, these guys are just going to throw themselves head first

[00:51:33] literally into the fracas and just fucking...

[00:51:36] They're doom slayers.

[00:51:37] They're gonna rip and tear.

[00:51:39] That's all they're gonna do is rip and tear.

[00:51:41] The ripping and the tearing?

[00:51:46] Roll a D6.

[00:51:49] This is before I hit...

[00:51:51] Yeah, this is so that I can figure out what kind of demon

[00:51:53] just walked up to you.

[00:51:54] Gotcha.

[00:51:55] Two.

[00:51:56] Two.

[00:51:57] Okay.

[00:51:58] And then a very large gorilla-shaped demon.

[00:52:02] Is that a...

[00:52:03] Garisrill?

[00:52:04] No, that is a Barogura.

[00:52:07] Oh, that's right.

[00:52:08] Okay.

[00:52:09] Gotcha.

[00:52:10] So I rolled a 16.

[00:52:13] So with my regular attack...

[00:52:15] I mean it's gonna hit unless it's not.

[00:52:18] No, the 16 has.

[00:52:21] Okay.

[00:52:22] It's gonna hit if it...

[00:52:23] Unless it doesn't.

[00:52:24] Yeah.

[00:52:25] I forget.

[00:52:26] It makes it magic and it makes it a D8.

[00:52:28] Plus, I think.

[00:52:29] Plus wisdom.

[00:52:30] Yep.

[00:52:31] Then you...

[00:52:34] So seven plus five is a 12 damage.

[00:52:38] Okay.

[00:52:39] Let me see.

[00:52:40] Okay.

[00:52:41] That's actually a fairly substantial hit against that one.

[00:52:44] Okay.

[00:52:45] It depends on whether or not it walked out of the radians first.

[00:52:48] Oh yeah, I forgot about that.

[00:52:51] It would have taken 31 radiant before.

[00:52:55] It rolled high enough.

[00:52:56] And a level of exhaustion.

[00:52:58] Well, it didn't matter because he passed his con safe.

[00:53:01] Yeah, I'm not worried about the minions.

[00:53:03] I'll roll for the big guys as we encounter them.

[00:53:05] That's all I can do on my turn.

[00:53:06] I use my bonus to cast the spiritual weapon and I attack with my shillet.

[00:53:10] Lucas.

[00:53:11] And I move it.

[00:53:12] Does starter up?

[00:53:13] Star me up.

[00:53:14] Yeah, in my free action I'll yell signal him to start the engine.

[00:53:18] Are our demon lords on our turn?

[00:53:20] On our initiative?

[00:53:21] Oh yeah.

[00:53:22] Orcas.

[00:53:23] That's what I thought up the head plan.

[00:53:25] Nope, you're right.

[00:53:27] Okay.

[00:53:28] Yeah, fuck it.

[00:53:30] I think he's just going to turn directly to his right and go right at Baphomet.

[00:53:33] Makes sense.

[00:53:36] I didn't think to look and see what their speed was.

[00:53:39] I think they're mostly 40.

[00:53:42] I think we're fine.

[00:53:44] Let's just fight them.

[00:53:46] Yeah, I don't really care.

[00:53:47] I also think 40 is going to basically make it almost all across the...

[00:53:51] Also true.

[00:53:52] Yeah.

[00:53:53] Okay, so Orcas is just going to do his regular attack which is a multi-attack.

[00:53:59] So you're running up?

[00:54:00] Yep, I'm just going straight at Baphomet.

[00:54:04] Who's got Baphomet?

[00:54:05] I do.

[00:54:06] What are we supposed to be rolling about for legendary actions?

[00:54:09] You can only do legendary actions at the end of another player's turn and then we're doing...

[00:54:13] We're rolling Orcas to see who gets the legendary action.

[00:54:17] So it's a multi-attack so I make two wand of Orcas attacks.

[00:54:23] So that's a 15 plus a 19.

[00:54:26] 34.

[00:54:27] So 34 to hit?

[00:54:28] I assume that hits.

[00:54:29] Yes, yes.

[00:54:30] I'll just go ahead and make the second attack.

[00:54:34] So it is a 28 to hit for the second one?

[00:54:37] Yeah.

[00:54:38] Okay.

[00:54:39] So both of them are 3d8 plus 8 bludgeoning plus 2d12 necrotic.

[00:54:46] Get out them diarollin' apps.

[00:54:49] It's your 68 plus 4d12.

[00:54:52] There's a reason why I wanted that one.

[00:54:57] Orcas is the coolest in my opinion.

[00:55:00] Mine too personally.

[00:55:01] I mean, he looks the coolest, that's for sure.

[00:55:04] He looks the coolest because that's the only one that came from that subscription thing

[00:55:13] that I get, that they put out shit ton of miniatures every month.

[00:55:18] He came in the abyss pack.

[00:55:21] It was 6.

[00:55:22] Oh he's dead.

[00:55:24] 39 bludgeoning damage.

[00:55:26] What?

[00:55:27] 39 bludgeoning damage.

[00:55:31] And then 24 necrotic.

[00:55:36] It's a good hit.

[00:55:38] Popped him.

[00:55:39] Lucas now you're up.

[00:55:41] Okay.

[00:55:42] Throw the lever, Crunk.

[00:55:44] If I throw the lever then the...

[00:55:47] Making our counter check.

[00:55:48] Sphere has to drop.

[00:55:49] What?

[00:55:50] Making our counter check.

[00:55:51] To throw the lever?

[00:55:52] Yeah, to get it going.

[00:55:54] Is the mojohn doing anything helpful?

[00:55:57] Take advantage of that.

[00:55:58] Thank you.

[00:55:59] He is helping.

[00:56:01] Taking advantage of a robot?

[00:56:04] Well it's a 19 on the die.

[00:56:06] That's plenty.

[00:56:07] You're good.

[00:56:08] Plus 10, so 29.

[00:56:09] Excellent.

[00:56:11] There is a shutter that runs through the whole device.

[00:56:15] It's like gears that haven't been turned in centuries are crunching free and starting to turn.

[00:56:24] You see the rings around the outside start to slowly move.

[00:56:27] You see the spheres inside start to rotate.

[00:56:31] Okay.

[00:56:32] And your platform stays right in the middle of it all.

[00:56:35] Like inside a test.

[00:56:36] Zoom that's my whole action.

[00:56:38] That's your action.

[00:56:39] You have a bonus, you have a move.

[00:56:41] If you have anything that you want to do.

[00:56:43] Obviously because I got to maintain this thing.

[00:56:45] No, but if you have something that's a move equivalent I don't know.

[00:56:48] No.

[00:56:49] Okay.

[00:56:50] But Baphomet can go then.

[00:56:51] Correct?

[00:56:52] So Baphomet's multi-attacks.

[00:56:54] Punched that orcus guy in his dick hole.

[00:56:56] Sorry, he's already on the way.

[00:56:57] Where was the legendary action by the way?

[00:56:58] Because I'm very interested in the legendary actions.

[00:57:00] Nobody said you wanted to take one.

[00:57:02] Well then I'll take all the legendary actions.

[00:57:04] I thought we had to roll it off.

[00:57:06] Yeah.

[00:57:07] Right?

[00:57:08] None of you tried to roll off.

[00:57:09] Now go ahead for the in between Schroeder and Lucas.

[00:57:12] Who gets the highest?

[00:57:13] Yeah, D20.

[00:57:14] No I think it should be love.

[00:57:15] I don't get to take a legendary action after my own.

[00:57:17] No.

[00:57:18] So just be the...

[00:57:19] I guess roll the natural 20.

[00:57:20] Okay.

[00:57:21] So I get a legendary action before my action is that?

[00:57:24] Yes.

[00:57:25] At the end of Baphomet's orcus' turn.

[00:57:29] I've just never played it this way before.

[00:57:31] Then I will take my heart cleaver attack since that's a thing.

[00:57:34] That's not a thing.

[00:57:35] It's literally called heart cleaver attack.

[00:57:37] Yeah, it's a melee attack.

[00:57:39] Yeah.

[00:57:40] I don't believe she did.

[00:57:41] As Kira comes out that door, she sees an awesome fucking clave.

[00:57:45] I want it!

[00:57:47] 24 to hit.

[00:57:49] Oh, an orcus?

[00:57:51] Yeah.

[00:57:52] I believe that will hit.

[00:57:57] It's pretty close.

[00:58:00] Yes, that hits.

[00:58:01] I'm kind of okay with orcus being the one that dies.

[00:58:04] Oh yeah, no 100% not very okay with orcus being the one that dies.

[00:58:07] He's using his bone dice on you.

[00:58:10] Oh cool, you can build a count.

[00:58:12] Slashing?

[00:58:13] Oh sorry, 31 slashing because it's a plus 10.

[00:58:17] Oh, whoops.

[00:58:18] You can add 8 damage to Baphomet.

[00:58:21] I forgot to add my plus 8 on my bludgeoning.

[00:58:24] Okay, so now I can take my actual attack.

[00:58:27] So it's a multi attack as well.

[00:58:29] A heart cleaver, a bite and a gore.

[00:58:33] You take all of them for the legendary?

[00:58:35] No, this is his actual turn.

[00:58:37] Oh sorry, that's my bad.

[00:58:39] I got you.

[00:58:40] So Baphomet gets three attacks.

[00:58:42] Heart cleaver again, natural 20.

[00:58:48] So now it's 8d6 instead of 46 plus 10.

[00:58:51] Yep.

[00:58:52] I'm sure you use it.

[00:58:53] 10, 16, there's 20.

[00:58:55] How many hit points does he have?

[00:58:57] Okay.

[00:58:58] 30, 36, 46 slashing.

[00:59:02] 18, did you add the plus 10?

[00:59:04] That's what the plus 10.

[00:59:05] Yep.

[00:59:06] Second attack is a bite.

[00:59:08] 18 on the die plus a 17 probably hits him.

[00:59:12] You know I forgot to say this but Baphomet can attack recklessly.

[00:59:16] Noice!

[00:59:18] What does that mean for me?

[00:59:20] You attack with advantage but everybody else gets to attack you with advantage.

[00:59:24] This round I'm just going to go.

[00:59:26] That's fine.

[00:59:27] I've already started.

[00:59:28] Anyway, again 18 plus 17 hits right?

[00:59:30] Yes.

[00:59:31] This is the 2d8.

[00:59:33] This is piercing.

[00:59:35] 6, 7, 8.

[00:59:37] 18 piercing.

[00:59:39] 18 piercing.

[00:59:41] That's it.

[00:59:42] What's that?

[00:59:44] 18 piercing.

[00:59:45] Okay.

[00:59:46] And the gore is a 30 hit.

[00:59:51] You have a plus 18?

[00:59:52] Plus 17.

[00:59:53] That's it.

[00:59:54] It's a plus 17 to hit on all of my attacks and that is a 2d10.

[01:00:01] That is 20 total piercing.

[01:00:04] I think I fucked him up.

[01:00:06] If this were a game of numbers that's a quarter of Orcas' health.

[01:00:12] What does this thing do?

[01:00:14] Frightful presence.

[01:00:15] Is that an action?

[01:00:16] The other demon lords do not give a fuck about your frightful presence.

[01:00:21] That's fair.

[01:00:22] Legendary action?

[01:00:24] Are you done?

[01:00:26] I can only attack three times so yeah now we all roll out for legendary action.

[01:00:30] No, I'll keep fighting Orcas.

[01:00:32] Yeah roll off for a legendary action.

[01:00:34] 18.

[01:00:35] You don't get one it's your turn.

[01:00:37] Yep.

[01:00:38] Is that the rule?

[01:00:40] Same thing I told him.

[01:00:42] You said we all roll.

[01:00:44] Fuck's sake.

[01:00:45] I rolled a 7.

[01:00:47] It doesn't matter.

[01:00:49] I've yet to roll above a 5 so far since we've started.

[01:00:52] 7 wins.

[01:00:53] Sweet.

[01:00:55] So I have something that costs two actions?

[01:00:59] Yep you can use it.

[01:01:00] It just costs two of your three legendary actions.

[01:01:02] Oh gotcha.

[01:01:03] It's the one you should use.

[01:01:05] Until your turn comes back around you have three legendary actions.

[01:01:10] You've used two of the three with this one action.

[01:01:13] Gotcha.

[01:01:14] So if you run out you don't get to roll.

[01:01:17] Gotcha.

[01:01:18] So I will cast Creeping Death so Orcas chooses a point on the ground that he can see within 100 feet of him.

[01:01:24] A cylinder of swirling necrotic energy 60 feet tall with a 10 foot radius rises at that point

[01:01:29] and lasts until the end of Orcas' next turn.

[01:01:31] Creatures in the area are vulnerable to necrotic damage.

[01:01:35] Cool.

[01:01:36] Where you doing it?

[01:01:37] Where you think?

[01:01:38] Okay.

[01:01:39] Right in the middle of his balls.

[01:01:41] Okay.

[01:01:42] My balls?

[01:01:43] Yeah.

[01:01:44] He's thinking you hit me like that and I'm not going to aim at fucking you up.

[01:01:47] That makes complete sense.

[01:01:49] I'm just saying it's a four way dance here.

[01:01:51] Yep.

[01:01:54] A single mouthpiece.

[01:01:57] Well done.

[01:02:02] Our title track Elders is provided by Sleep for the Weary off their debut album Knock Turns.

[01:02:09] Learn more about the band at sleepfortheweary.com.

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