Dungeon Crawl Classics - Veiled Vaults of the Onyx Queen 03

[00:00:00] The Rancors Brothel presents...

[00:00:03] DUNGEON FOOL!

[00:00:27] But the sarcophagus does pop open.

[00:00:39] For the audience, it's a giant pictographic keyboard.

[00:00:44] It's a C in spell.

[00:00:47] On the plaque, there were four words that were missing letters.

[00:00:51] An O in book, a P in striped, an E in believed, and an N in once.

[00:00:58] O-P-E-N open.

[00:01:00] Yep. Oh my god, they pushed the volcano like three times.

[00:01:03] Which I didn't realize that the pictograph were things that were in order by the alphabet.

[00:01:10] Ant, bat, centipede, dog, egg, etc.

[00:01:13] Well, I love the fact that he got to what is clearly...

[00:01:16] He's like a ball of yarn and I'm like, if he says zombie, he might get it.

[00:01:20] And he's like, some guy doing an interpretive dance or a yoga pose.

[00:01:24] I mean, I kind of thought zombie, but I went with the funny thing.

[00:01:28] But I wasn't making the connection that... yeah.

[00:01:32] I mean, I love this list because there's a whole page of everything that fucking happens if you don't push O-P-E-N.

[00:01:40] Most of them are summonings.

[00:01:44] But like the frog, the user is transformed into a frog.

[00:01:47] The newly transformed character retains all its memories, but assumes the creature's manner of locomotion as well as the ability to survive in the creature's normal habitat.

[00:01:54] The change is permanent. No saving throw.

[00:01:57] Heart! The user suddenly feels a sharp pain deep within their chest as the heart explodes. Instant death.

[00:02:04] Shit like that.

[00:02:05] What happens if I press the xylophone?

[00:02:07] Xylophone! The user is overcome with the maddening music of the spheres that plays relentlessly in their mind,

[00:02:12] causing them to unnaturally age 2d30 years.

[00:02:16] For every 20 years aged, the user permanently loses one point of strength, agility and stamina, but gains one point of intelligence and personality.

[00:02:23] What about the turtle? Does he turn into a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle?

[00:02:27] The user is cursed with slothfulness and suffers a permanent minus 10 movement penalty.

[00:02:32] The curse can be lifted by eating a bowl of turtle soup or with a successful remove curse spell.

[00:02:37] Uh...

[00:02:38] I didn't read all these.

[00:02:40] Yeah, they're good.

[00:02:41] A unicorn! A randomly determined level 1 wizard spell is suddenly cast from the sarcophagus, targeting the user.

[00:02:47] I think they got that one too. I don't remember.

[00:02:50] What is in the sarcophagus?

[00:02:52] Decayed body.

[00:02:53] Oh, okay.

[00:02:54] Holding a book.

[00:02:55] I will scream out to...

[00:02:57] Arreowan.

[00:02:59] Wait a minute. You made us roll for something in the room with the monster.

[00:03:03] Everybody had to make a roll in the 15 foot whatever blah blah blah.

[00:03:06] Yeah.

[00:03:07] Pass roll, nothing happened?

[00:03:08] Pass roll, nothing happened.

[00:03:09] Okay.

[00:03:10] I will scream out for somebody to get in here, essentially.

[00:03:13] And I will fire on the centipede.

[00:03:15] He's fighting a centipede and we're fighting some sort of horrific beast that just vomited and killed like 3 characters.

[00:03:20] Yeah, we'll get ya. We'll get to ya.

[00:03:22] A giant centipede.

[00:03:25] 16.

[00:03:26] Oh yeah, that hits.

[00:03:28] 5 again.

[00:03:29] Uh, it drops.

[00:03:30] Sweet!

[00:03:31] Do I have time to grab the book?

[00:03:33] Yeah, you can grab it.

[00:03:34] Okay.

[00:03:35] Make sure nothing happens.

[00:03:36] Nothing else in there besides a corpse and a book.

[00:03:39] Correct.

[00:03:40] Okay.

[00:03:41] The desiccated figure of King Zortula the Wise clutching a large grimoire in his bony hands.

[00:03:46] Rudy's halfway back?

[00:03:48] Yeah.

[00:03:49] Don Nutz will throw another knife.

[00:03:51] Or dagger.

[00:03:52] No, that's not gonna do.

[00:03:54] An 8.

[00:03:55] Nope.

[00:03:56] That's it.

[00:03:57] Okay.

[00:03:58] Cody.

[00:03:59] Spencer.

[00:04:00] No.

[00:04:01] Spencer's top of the round.

[00:04:02] You're last.

[00:04:03] Oh, okay.

[00:04:04] Uh, Jesus Christ.

[00:04:05] Did I skip Spencer?

[00:04:06] I think you did.

[00:04:07] I don't remember Spencer taking any actions, so.

[00:04:09] I did.

[00:04:10] No, he did before I spewed vomit all over everybody.

[00:04:13] Okay.

[00:04:14] I missed twice.

[00:04:15] Then you.

[00:04:16] Twice.

[00:04:17] I thought, okay, I didn't know what the round was.

[00:04:20] Yeah.

[00:04:21] Jesus will continue with his bid.

[00:04:23] How dare you kill Bumbus!

[00:04:25] 3.

[00:04:26] Cheechin has no weapon.

[00:04:27] Rio is down.

[00:04:28] Bumbus is down.

[00:04:30] Uh, Cheechin will run out and pick up the hand axe?

[00:04:34] Okay.

[00:04:35] And he will swing with it.

[00:04:37] I got a 4.

[00:04:38] Cool.

[00:04:39] Spencer.

[00:04:40] Uh, Mr. Ed just kind of covered in bile and grave worms, uh, will, um.

[00:04:43] He got out of the way, didn't he?

[00:04:46] No, Mr. Ed didn't.

[00:04:47] He took 2 damage.

[00:04:48] He's down to 1.

[00:04:49] Artist formerly is, uh, did well.

[00:04:50] He didn't get hit.

[00:04:51] Okay.

[00:04:52] Ah, 15 with the severed leg.

[00:04:53] That will hit.

[00:04:54] A severed leg.

[00:04:55] That's a good one.

[00:04:56] I'm gonna go with a 4.

[00:04:58] Sure.

[00:04:59] Cool.

[00:05:00] Does he have a strength bonus?

[00:05:01] Nobody does.

[00:05:02] Alright.

[00:05:03] Uh, 3.

[00:05:04] 3?

[00:05:05] Okay.

[00:05:06] Alright.

[00:05:07] Dang, this thing, it's almost like it's guarding a tomb or something and it's powerful.

[00:05:12] Um, Artist formerly will swing the mace.

[00:05:15] I'm getting 8.

[00:05:16] Okay.

[00:05:17] Uh, and oh yeah!

[00:05:18] I'm gonna go with a 4.

[00:05:21] I'm gonna swing the mace.

[00:05:22] I'm getting 8.

[00:05:23] Okay.

[00:05:24] Uh, and oh yeah!

[00:05:27] Uh, Storm Anvil's gonna keep running down that hallway.

[00:05:30] Another 20 feet or whatever.

[00:05:32] Okay.

[00:05:33] Making any attempt at being stealthy, just tear an ass down there.

[00:05:36] Tear an ass.

[00:05:37] Cool.

[00:05:38] Uh, you are 40% of the way down that hallway.

[00:05:41] Cool.

[00:05:42] Who all is standing in front of the monster?

[00:05:45] I presume most of us still.

[00:05:47] Right.

[00:05:48] How many are left?

[00:05:49] I've got 2.

[00:05:50] You've got 2.

[00:05:51] I've got 1.

[00:05:52] You've got 1.

[00:05:53] Okay, D5.

[00:05:54] I know I've got a D5 somewhere.

[00:05:55] 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.

[00:05:57] 2.

[00:05:58] Well that's unfortunate.

[00:06:00] Which one is that?

[00:06:01] Oh, I don't care.

[00:06:03] I missed either way.

[00:06:04] Nice.

[00:06:05] The power of the cheese protects!

[00:06:07] The cheese preserves!

[00:06:09] Goes to bite and just whips one of the holy symbols around its mouth and...

[00:06:13] Oi!

[00:06:14] This is what you do when the croc's trying to bite your jibbly bits!

[00:06:17] Troy, you're up.

[00:06:19] I'm protected by the riot of the Gouda.

[00:06:21] Is there anything on the cover of the book and any words, descriptions of what this thing might be?

[00:06:28] Something about the magical workings of King Zortula the Wise.

[00:06:33] Oh.

[00:06:34] A magic spell book.

[00:06:35] Perhaps.

[00:06:36] Possibly.

[00:06:37] I will tuck that away.

[00:06:40] What's your occupation?

[00:06:41] A trapper.

[00:06:42] A trapper?

[00:06:43] You might actually have...

[00:06:45] Give me an intelligence roll.

[00:06:47] D20 or D10?

[00:06:48] D20.

[00:06:50] 11?

[00:06:51] I'll give it to you.

[00:06:52] That is...

[00:06:54] I know it told me what the book was wrapped in, or what it was bound in.

[00:06:59] The hide of a venomous beaver squirrel.

[00:07:01] Minotaur.

[00:07:02] Minotaur!

[00:07:03] Bound in Minotaur hide and contains wizard spells.

[00:07:08] Okay.

[00:07:09] What else you got Troy?

[00:07:10] He will sling at the monster.

[00:07:13] Hold on.

[00:07:14] Oh yeah, I can stay away from you and do that.

[00:07:16] 10?

[00:07:17] 10.

[00:07:18] Nope.

[00:07:19] Does that give Rudy enough time to be back in action?

[00:07:20] Sure.

[00:07:21] Takes his move to get back, he's got an action.

[00:07:23] He's got a staff which is just a D4 so he'll swing his staff and that's not going to

[00:07:29] hit.

[00:07:30] And on us with his dagger, 15.

[00:07:34] That'll hit.

[00:07:36] 3.

[00:07:37] This one goes right in the eye.

[00:07:38] Oh!

[00:07:39] And the creature slumps to the ground.

[00:07:41] Nice.

[00:07:42] Starts dribbling out the fetid bits that it was spewing.

[00:07:45] Spit on a holy symbol.

[00:07:46] Stick it right in its eye.

[00:07:47] There's a knife in it.

[00:07:48] Yeah, just keep pushing Jeff.

[00:07:49] Is this cycloptic?

[00:07:50] Crocodile?

[00:07:51] Hippo?

[00:07:52] Oh no, he already got one eye.

[00:07:53] Oh okay.

[00:07:54] You got the other.

[00:07:55] What do we do to see if we can save Steve Rogers?

[00:07:58] I believe it says you can't roll the body on zero level characters but that may

[00:08:03] just be hearsay.

[00:08:04] Oh.

[00:08:05] Zero level character that reaches zero hit points is irrevocably killed.

[00:08:08] Okay.

[00:08:09] Page 93.

[00:08:10] Okay.

[00:08:11] The body of the monster is destroyed.

[00:08:12] The body of a dead ally can be recovered.

[00:08:17] There's a chance the ally may not be truly killed.

[00:08:19] The character reaches a dead ally's body within one hour.

[00:08:22] It can make a luck check when its body is rolled over.

[00:08:24] That's what it says on the same page.

[00:08:26] Okay, unfortunately Steve Rogers is dead.

[00:08:29] Depends on which way you want to read that on page 93 Jeff.

[00:08:32] It states pretty clearly that zero level characters die when they hit zero.

[00:08:36] Correct, because any character level higher than that bleeds out at zero and doesn't

[00:08:41] die.

[00:08:42] Ah, okay.

[00:08:43] But then it goes on to say if a body of a dead ally can be recovered there's a

[00:08:46] chance the ally may not be truly killed.

[00:08:48] Can be recovered.

[00:08:49] If a character reaches a dead ally's body within one hour the dead

[00:08:52] character may make a luck check when his body is rolled over.

[00:08:55] On a successful check the dead character was badly injured but is not

[00:08:58] permanently killed.

[00:08:59] Have Steve make a luck roll.

[00:09:00] You got two other dead characters if you want to try.

[00:09:02] I was going to.

[00:09:03] Rolled a one.

[00:09:04] Nice.

[00:09:05] Give him all the tokens.

[00:09:07] That's fair.

[00:09:08] That's a crit.

[00:09:09] Yeah.

[00:09:10] Give him that luck token.

[00:09:11] Try it Grady.

[00:09:13] Just fucking roll it.

[00:09:14] I'm going to.

[00:09:15] There are other things that apply to a rolled body.

[00:09:18] You are at one hit point.

[00:09:19] For the next hour you have a negative four penalty to all rolls.

[00:09:24] And you sustain a permanent injury of some kind reflected as a permanent

[00:09:29] negative one to strength, agility or stamina determined randomly.

[00:09:33] He still stands up, pulls the shield tight and keeps going.

[00:09:36] Give him a negative one.

[00:09:38] Huh?

[00:09:39] Give him a negative one to one of his physical stats.

[00:09:41] Strength, agility, stamina.

[00:09:43] Agility.

[00:09:44] Uh.

[00:09:45] Uh.

[00:09:47] Lonnie Tames, Rio.

[00:09:49] I suppose that makes some sense.

[00:09:51] But now he's a negative two agility.

[00:09:53] I rolled a nine under 11.

[00:09:55] He's a one hit point.

[00:09:57] Strength.

[00:09:58] Is a seven still a minus one?

[00:10:00] I don't know.

[00:10:01] And old Bumbus Filbert needs to roll well or he's dead.

[00:10:05] I rolled a 19 over eight.

[00:10:07] I just rolled the beekeeper.

[00:10:09] She's still alive but she's still back there and I want her to stay there.

[00:10:13] Just so we know.

[00:10:14] But she's, just however this ends she never left.

[00:10:18] She's just hanging out with a bunch of those bodies.

[00:10:20] Oh no!

[00:10:21] The one who went back and grabbed the staff from her?

[00:10:23] What's his name?

[00:10:25] That was Rudy Baga.

[00:10:27] Rudy Baga knows that what's her name is alive.

[00:10:30] Okay cool.

[00:10:31] She's just hanging out.

[00:10:32] You guys get that door open yet?

[00:10:34] Alright so there's that.

[00:10:36] Troy's still in combat with a centipede though.

[00:10:39] Her stamina goes down by one.

[00:10:41] I killed it!

[00:10:42] What would you guys like to do from here?

[00:10:44] Oh what lawful characters do we still have?

[00:10:46] Cheech and Chong.

[00:10:47] Rudy Baga and Steve Rogers.

[00:10:50] Mr. Ed and Storm Anvil.

[00:10:52] The lawful characters all hear a voice that says rescue me.

[00:10:56] I am trapped above before the voice once again fades away.

[00:11:00] Storm Anvil again says,

[00:11:02] What's in it for me?

[00:11:03] How much money are you paying me?

[00:11:05] He says to no one in particular.

[00:11:07] Other people can hear that voice?

[00:11:09] Yeah I'm gone.

[00:11:10] They can now.

[00:11:11] You can't hear Storm Anvil because...

[00:11:12] Well Cheech and Chong has been here for an indeterminate amount of time

[00:11:15] and I assume has been hearing that voice for hours and hours and days.

[00:11:17] Oh could be yeah.

[00:11:18] Could be yeah.

[00:11:19] Storm Anvil, make me a I guess intelligence check.

[00:11:25] 12.

[00:11:26] You hear chanting.

[00:11:27] Cool.

[00:11:28] And you see lights ahead of you.

[00:11:29] Okay.

[00:11:30] I'm gonna stop hauling ass and slow down.

[00:11:33] Okay.

[00:11:34] Can I sneak ahead?

[00:11:35] Sure.

[00:11:36] Agility.

[00:11:37] Uh 19.

[00:11:39] Nice.

[00:11:40] You sneak up ahead.

[00:11:42] You can make it to the end of the room.

[00:11:44] You basically see a ritual going on.

[00:11:46] Nice.

[00:11:47] You see a shit ton of those cultists.

[00:11:50] You see a woman in a crown.

[00:11:52] You see a robed priest type person.

[00:11:55] And you see this writhing mass of black on the other side of an altar.

[00:12:00] I think you found a boss room.

[00:12:02] Writhing mass of black.

[00:12:05] It looks like there are a bunch of dead bodies on that altar.

[00:12:10] I see a writhing mass.

[00:12:12] It was all really black.

[00:12:14] They chanted ever more the writhing it was black.

[00:12:19] It looks like some of the some of the light is like normal fire like braziers.

[00:12:24] And at the end of the chamber way down there on the other side of the altar you see blue light.

[00:12:31] There were some blue flames and a brazier next to it.

[00:12:35] The cultists chanted it was creepy as shit.

[00:12:41] Nice.

[00:12:42] Uh nothing of value here.

[00:12:45] And he turns around and looks the other direction.

[00:12:48] Agility.

[00:12:50] Lucky can you be twice?

[00:12:52] Five.

[00:12:53] You wanted that.

[00:12:54] Well yes he did.

[00:12:56] Okay you head back upstairs.

[00:12:58] That's worse.

[00:12:59] That's a lot fucking worse.

[00:13:01] Oh he heard chanting downstairs?

[00:13:03] Yeah no he was the one down there past the board cube.

[00:13:07] Okay.

[00:13:08] And then he came back after his roll of a five.

[00:13:10] But it was okay.

[00:13:12] That wasn't a stealth check?

[00:13:14] Yeah it was.

[00:13:15] Oh yeah five is low.

[00:13:17] It's pretty low.

[00:13:18] It is in fact low.

[00:13:19] Okay everybody else up in the hallway what are you guys doing?

[00:13:22] I think we head up.

[00:13:23] You know what actually now that I think about it artists formally probably changed his alignment

[00:13:28] to Lawful.

[00:13:29] I can see that yeah.

[00:13:31] I really feel like artists formally as a squire hears this voice he wants to do something about it.

[00:13:37] Okay.

[00:13:38] I want to go up.

[00:13:39] I want to go up the stairs.

[00:13:40] That's fair.

[00:13:41] Cheech it and we'll follow.

[00:13:42] And as Storm Anvil will come in and go,

[00:13:45] Ah nothing good down there let's go somewhere else.

[00:13:48] And he'll tell everyone what he saw.

[00:13:49] The power of chatter will cleanse the voices that you hear.

[00:13:53] Unless you got a dip man shut up.

[00:13:55] Everybody going up?

[00:13:56] Yeah.

[00:13:57] Okay you get upstairs and you find a very similar layout to downstairs.

[00:14:02] There's a square central area with gates.

[00:14:05] There are rooms on the in the middle of the cardinal direction hallways.

[00:14:10] So there four up here then or three?

[00:14:12] Three.

[00:14:13] Okay so we come up on the same thing.

[00:14:14] Northeast and west.

[00:14:15] So is there a fountain and everything in there?

[00:14:17] There is.

[00:14:19] Let me find it.

[00:14:20] You just said I you just said similar so I didn't know how similar.

[00:14:23] It is doors not gates.

[00:14:25] Okay so there are four hallways in a square and on the inside there are doors.

[00:14:31] Are there four doors?

[00:14:32] There's whole doors.

[00:14:33] Whole doors.

[00:14:34] To the square area in the middle?

[00:14:35] Yes.

[00:14:36] Yes.

[00:14:37] Okay so we have an outside square with three doors and we have an inside square with four doors.

[00:14:42] Okay.

[00:14:43] Four doors.

[00:14:44] Correct.

[00:14:45] And so does it go.

[00:14:46] These guys are coming up these stairs.

[00:14:48] Okay so there's no more.

[00:14:50] There's no further up to go.

[00:14:52] Okay let's.

[00:14:54] Center room or what?

[00:14:55] Let's do center room first.

[00:14:57] Yeah.

[00:14:58] Approach one of the central doors.

[00:15:00] Oh before I wanted to say Don Nott collected his daggers.

[00:15:04] Yeah I figured.

[00:15:05] And Steve Rogers and Rudy Vega will swap a Kutramom because Steve is probably not going to be worth a damn in a fight.

[00:15:16] Yeah.

[00:15:17] So Rudy Vega now has a spear and shield.

[00:15:20] Okay.

[00:15:21] It looks like all four of those outside or those inner doors are chain shut.

[00:15:26] Is there like a lock on the chain?

[00:15:29] Yes.

[00:15:30] Okay.

[00:15:31] Can I pick the lock?

[00:15:32] You can try.

[00:15:33] Okay.

[00:15:34] Who's doing it?

[00:15:35] I'm going to say that the person who would most likely have experience is the dwarf.

[00:15:40] Storm Anvil.

[00:15:41] Yeah Storm Anvil.

[00:15:42] What's his alignment?

[00:15:44] Law.

[00:15:45] Okay.

[00:15:46] Breaking the law.

[00:15:47] Breaking the law.

[00:15:48] 16.

[00:15:49] First of all, once again you hear the same sorrow filled voice call out in your mind.

[00:15:53] Only this time more clear and resounding.

[00:15:55] I lie beyond these doors a prisoner forgotten to time.

[00:15:58] Beware for only magic can destroy magic as...what's his name?

[00:16:02] Storm Anvil.

[00:16:03] Storm Anvil.

[00:16:04] I knew it was Storm something.

[00:16:05] Uh touches the chains in the lock.

[00:16:08] You take one damage.

[00:16:09] Gotcha.

[00:16:10] Oh that's smart.

[00:16:11] I didn't like that.

[00:16:13] Didn't kill you?

[00:16:14] I got three health.

[00:16:15] No I got two.

[00:16:16] Alright.

[00:16:17] What do you guys want to do?

[00:16:18] Let's go check out another room.

[00:16:20] I'll just go to the door to the right despite coding.

[00:16:23] Your funeral.

[00:16:24] North, east or west?

[00:16:26] East.

[00:16:27] I'm not sure which one's right.

[00:16:28] I don't know.

[00:16:29] I'm saying words.

[00:16:30] East.

[00:16:31] East.

[00:16:32] The vault sports walls decorated with life-size paintings of a serf, a saint, a scholar

[00:16:38] and a soldier.

[00:16:39] An ornate marble sarcophagus veined in gold rests in the center of the chamber.

[00:16:45] Alright.

[00:16:46] I think you need to look at that other handout you weren't supposed to look at yet, Troy.

[00:16:49] Yep, that's what you see.

[00:16:50] A serf holding a pitchfork, smiling.

[00:16:52] A saint with sort of a bit of a sort of glow halo-ish thingy.

[00:16:57] Holding a bird who I would not say is smiling, more a ponderance maybe.

[00:17:03] Soldier, sword and shield.

[00:17:05] Can't really tell his expression because he's got a huge moustache.

[00:17:08] A scholar who's reading a book who looks like with a furrowed brow.

[00:17:12] Everybody can give me an intelligence check.

[00:17:14] It's a D10 unless you are like the squire or something like that.

[00:17:18] The menstrual.

[00:17:19] Oh, no, I was just saying I already got it.

[00:17:21] Hold that up, Troy.

[00:17:22] Pitchfork.

[00:17:23] P.

[00:17:26] Angry bird.

[00:17:27] A.

[00:17:28] Got a 19.

[00:17:29] I got a 19.

[00:17:31] This is a very low intelligence check.

[00:17:33] It was only DC3.

[00:17:35] This is Prince Amaro, nephew to Queen Yaris.

[00:17:39] This was struck down about 30 years ago in his 20th year by an unknown illness.

[00:17:46] Why was it he recorded?

[00:17:48] I don't know.

[00:17:49] Is there maybe nothing in the sarcophagus?

[00:17:51] No, because the last thing recorded was the death of the king.

[00:17:56] Right.

[00:17:57] You could have died previous to that.

[00:17:58] Well, but he just said 30 years ago.

[00:18:00] Can I see Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy or whatever?

[00:18:02] Thanks.

[00:18:03] But 30 years ago.

[00:18:04] Spell out pants.

[00:18:05] That's what it is.

[00:18:06] I was going to spell it pants.

[00:18:07] What are we doing?

[00:18:08] So this is what I see in the room.

[00:18:10] I'm going to go up to the sarcophagus.

[00:18:12] Okay.

[00:18:13] Does it budge or do I see anything on it?

[00:18:15] Engraved in the top.

[00:18:16] My life is a volume of grief, each sorrow upon a new leaf.

[00:18:20] Stiff as my spine and my body is pale, yet ready am I to tell you a tale.

[00:18:25] Read that again please.

[00:18:26] My life is a volume of grief, each sorrow upon a new leaf.

[00:18:31] Stiff as my spine and my body is pale, yet ready am I to tell you a tale.

[00:18:36] A lot of those things are referencing a book.

[00:18:38] Leaf, spine, tail.

[00:18:40] Are any of the paintings?

[00:18:44] Yeah, so the scholar is the key.

[00:18:46] The scholar is holding a book.

[00:18:47] Yep.

[00:18:48] Yeah, I want to go closer and look at the scholar.

[00:18:50] Okay.

[00:18:51] What are you going to do?

[00:18:52] Can I see what book he's holding or what's in the book?

[00:18:56] Nope.

[00:18:57] No details.

[00:18:58] Can I...

[00:18:59] Touch.

[00:19:00] Storm Anvil is going to lick the scholar.

[00:19:05] That's just creepy.

[00:19:06] Okay.

[00:19:07] Didn't even ask first.

[00:19:09] Did anything happen when he touched it?

[00:19:11] So, it's just a room with a sarcophagus and these are paintings, right?

[00:19:15] Yes.

[00:19:16] Four paintings.

[00:19:17] What do you got, Troy?

[00:19:18] I mean, the last riddle we had gave us a clue to open a thing.

[00:19:24] This seems to be another sort of riddle.

[00:19:26] Right.

[00:19:27] Referencing a book.

[00:19:29] So, I have something to...

[00:19:31] These are paintings?

[00:19:33] Mm-hmm.

[00:19:34] Of frescos.

[00:19:35] Frescos.

[00:19:36] I love fresca.

[00:19:37] So, licking it was a good choice.

[00:19:39] Especially a melt.

[00:19:40] Love a fresco melt.

[00:19:42] Remember that time that you guys wouldn't tell me what kind of snacks and drinks you wanted me to bring, so I brought fresca and candy corn?

[00:19:48] I can't remember that.

[00:19:49] And everybody drank the shit out of the fresca?

[00:19:52] I hate fresca.

[00:19:53] I think it's disgusting.

[00:19:54] It's not the worst thing.

[00:19:56] No, but I don't voluntarily want to drink it either.

[00:20:00] Thanks for the reminder.

[00:20:04] If you pull candy corn out of there...

[00:20:06] No.

[00:20:07] That would be funny.

[00:20:09] Cheechin will go over, is it possible to lift these paintings off the wall?

[00:20:14] Well, they're painted on the wall.

[00:20:16] Correct.

[00:20:17] Well, at one point he said paintings and then he said frescos, so I was just checking.

[00:20:20] I'm looking.

[00:20:21] It does say paintings.

[00:20:22] I was just curious if you could lift them off the wall or anything.

[00:20:25] It doesn't mention lifting them off the wall.

[00:20:29] I'm not sure.

[00:20:30] I push it.

[00:20:31] Does it open a secret chamber?

[00:20:32] It does not.

[00:20:33] It is firmly affixed to the wall.

[00:20:35] Touch the book.

[00:20:36] Okay.

[00:20:37] Anything happen?

[00:20:38] Nope.

[00:20:39] You have acquired two books.

[00:20:40] Yeah, I had that thought but...

[00:20:42] We go to another room.

[00:20:43] Yeah, let's go to another room.

[00:20:45] You got north and west.

[00:20:47] North, yeah.

[00:20:48] Counterclockwise.

[00:20:49] I'm just making sure of something.

[00:20:50] Okay, yeah.

[00:20:51] Which one?

[00:20:52] North.

[00:20:53] North.

[00:20:54] The ponderous door opens to an amazing sight.

[00:20:56] A massive oak tree grows from the center of the vault.

[00:20:59] Its leafy branches are heavy with acorns and stretch to the ceiling before curving down

[00:21:04] along the walls in a defiant display of life within such a desolate place.

[00:21:10] Radigast, you're up.

[00:21:11] Otherwise, I'm going to spit on a holy symbol.

[00:21:13] There's a tree with some acorns.

[00:21:15] Correct.

[00:21:16] We'll get closer to the tree.

[00:21:17] Do we sort of start circling it?

[00:21:20] Do we see anything?

[00:21:21] Trees have leaves.

[00:21:22] Make me a luck check.

[00:21:23] They do.

[00:21:24] I don't know about spines or indexes or whatever joke.

[00:21:27] One again.

[00:21:28] Nice.

[00:21:29] You notice frescoes hidden by the branches of the tree.

[00:21:33] Do they come with candy corn?

[00:21:35] They do not.

[00:21:37] Through the mighty oak's heavy branches, you catch sight of brightly colored frescoes

[00:21:42] upon the walls depicting a floral queen crowned in garland.

[00:21:46] She sits in a lush garden surrounded by gentle creatures of the forest.

[00:21:50] Snow white.

[00:21:52] Any Disney princess really.

[00:21:54] Deadpool.

[00:21:55] Mystique.

[00:21:56] Mystique does not appear in...

[00:21:58] Is the beekeeper still around?

[00:22:00] Nope.

[00:22:01] Nope.

[00:22:02] Any herbalists?

[00:22:03] Minstrel.

[00:22:04] I mean former herbalists.

[00:22:05] Shaman.

[00:22:06] Do you have a minstrel?

[00:22:07] Yeah, shaman.

[00:22:08] And a trapper.

[00:22:09] I do have a shaman and we do have a trapper.

[00:22:10] Give me an intelligence check.

[00:22:12] Roll a d20 for those characters.

[00:22:14] 19 for the minstrel.

[00:22:15] 18.

[00:22:16] This is the tomb of the verdant queen.

[00:22:20] Entered within this vault is the gentle nature loving queen suma known for her

[00:22:24] diplomacy and goodwill.

[00:22:25] Queen Summa was a passionate nature lover who much preferred spending time in the

[00:22:30] forest rather than the throne room.

[00:22:32] Despite her dying wish to be buried in the palace gardens, she was interred here

[00:22:36] as royal custom dictated.

[00:22:38] Anything interesting about the frescoes?

[00:22:40] We have her surrounded by woodland animals.

[00:22:43] We have a magic tree.

[00:22:45] I touch the tree.

[00:22:47] Who does?

[00:22:48] Person I care the least about.

[00:22:49] Mr. Ed.

[00:22:50] Mr. Ed.

[00:22:51] Nothing happens.

[00:22:53] Nothing happens.

[00:22:54] Okay.

[00:22:55] Just feels like a normal tree.

[00:22:56] Okay.

[00:22:57] Can I try to climb it?

[00:22:58] Sure.

[00:22:59] Yeah, I'll try to climb the tree.

[00:23:00] You can climb the tree.

[00:23:01] Make me an agility check.

[00:23:02] Go ahead and go and give them a break.

[00:23:05] Sorry, man.

[00:23:07] Twice.

[00:23:08] How many have I taken from you?

[00:23:10] Five.

[00:23:11] Four.

[00:23:12] Four?

[00:23:13] Yeah, not bad, man.

[00:23:14] Not bad.

[00:23:15] Spencer rolled a one which means Troy lost his fleeting luck that he got for

[00:23:20] rolling one.

[00:23:21] I assume I can't even get past the trunk.

[00:23:24] I'm debating whether you fall and take damage.

[00:23:26] I mean, I gotta then at least be able to make a save, right?

[00:23:30] No.

[00:23:31] Well, you know, I am.

[00:23:32] I'm a GM.

[00:23:33] I'll do whatever the fuck I want, bud.

[00:23:36] Running against Spencer, it feels glorious.

[00:23:38] The power.

[00:23:40] The shaman.

[00:23:42] What did you get on your intelligence check?

[00:23:44] I didn't roll for him.

[00:23:45] I just started with the minstrel and I figured the 19 was what you wanted.

[00:23:47] The shaman's gonna get something different.

[00:23:50] Fair enough.

[00:23:51] I will roll for him.

[00:23:52] Dr. Chong rolled a...

[00:23:54] I don't know if he's got a bonus, but not great, Jeff.

[00:23:57] So if you're looking for help there, you're not finding it.

[00:23:59] What did the trapper get?

[00:24:01] On...

[00:24:02] The intelligence check.

[00:24:03] Oh, 19.

[00:24:04] 19?

[00:24:05] Okay.

[00:24:06] You know that the tree is tied to a patron of nature.

[00:24:09] She was very obviously a worshiper or a...

[00:24:13] It was her patron.

[00:24:15] Yggdrasil the world root.

[00:24:17] At the base of the tree you see a shattered sarcophagus.

[00:24:20] A shattered sarcophagus?

[00:24:22] Shattered stone sarcophagus.

[00:24:24] Is the tree like growing out of it or did the tree break it?

[00:24:27] Nope.

[00:24:28] Nope.

[00:24:29] The sarcophagus was laid next to it, supposedly.

[00:24:31] Anything in the rubble of the shattered sarcophagus.

[00:24:34] You can roll a luck check and see.

[00:24:38] Yes, that goes under.

[00:24:40] You find a silver plaque worth 30 gold.

[00:24:43] What does it say?

[00:24:44] It says Queen Suma.

[00:24:45] Ah.

[00:24:46] I'm rich.

[00:24:47] I'm out of here.

[00:24:48] Your slinger stocking up?

[00:24:50] Yeah, he would go for some acorns.

[00:24:52] Get them acorns.

[00:24:53] Yeah.

[00:24:54] Uh...

[00:24:55] Nibble on an acorn.

[00:24:56] Like, does it seem normal?

[00:24:58] It's bitter.

[00:24:59] Well, yeah, acorns normally are.

[00:25:01] Just, it's fascinating that this tree is growing literally in the middle of a room.

[00:25:05] Yep.

[00:25:06] Does it seem like a normal tree?

[00:25:07] Other than the fact that it's growing in a room?

[00:25:09] Dr. Chong will touch the tree.

[00:25:11] It was a testament to the dead queen's passion for nature and devotion to her patron Idrigal.

[00:25:17] Idrigal.

[00:25:18] The world root.

[00:25:19] And the frescoes were just her sitting around with some woodland creatures?

[00:25:22] Basically.

[00:25:23] Is there a book we can press?

[00:25:24] No.

[00:25:25] Okay.

[00:25:26] The shepherd will also pluck a leaf.

[00:25:28] Okay.

[00:25:29] Walk all the way around the room, nothing else to see?

[00:25:31] Nope.

[00:25:32] Nothing on the ceiling?

[00:25:33] I guess we go to the last room?

[00:25:35] Okay.

[00:25:36] Question mark?

[00:25:37] Real high?

[00:25:39] Did you ever have the feeling that you didn't solve two puzzle rooms?

[00:25:44] Kinda, yes but no.

[00:25:46] Yeah, maybe more informational help, we'll see.

[00:25:49] Because we need something magical.

[00:25:52] Correct.

[00:25:53] So you're going to...

[00:25:55] The third room.

[00:25:56] The third room.

[00:25:57] The west room.

[00:25:58] The west roast room.

[00:25:59] I mean there's clearly magical stuff probably in those rooms.

[00:26:02] I mean, one could surmise the leaf is magical.

[00:26:06] Acorns may be magical.

[00:26:08] You enter the vault of a time forgotten king.

[00:26:10] Its walls are covered in murals depicting bloody conquest.

[00:26:14] Each scene shows the same armor clad warrior king at the fore.

[00:26:19] Leading his troops into battle with a massive sword held high in the center of the vault rests an iron sarcophagus that is cold and grim as a weapon of war.

[00:26:29] Inspect the sarcophagus.

[00:26:30] Okay.

[00:26:31] Is there any plaques or things to read or buttons to press?

[00:26:36] A heavy sarcophagus wrought of black iron dominates the center of the vault.

[00:26:41] Its lid is carved with the image of an armor clad warrior clutching a massive sword.

[00:26:46] To his breast, a large silver funeral plaque reads King Relgar and marks his death more than 1,000 years ago.

[00:26:54] Do we have any particularly strong characters?

[00:26:57] Not over here.

[00:26:59] Anybody with a plus to strength at all.

[00:27:01] Lani did, but he's rolling at a minus four now because he died.

[00:27:07] This thing's big.

[00:27:09] It looks like you could get about 10 people in there trying to lift it.

[00:27:12] As part of my being a trapper apparently I have a pole, 10 foot pole.

[00:27:18] Okay.

[00:27:19] Leverage.

[00:27:20] No, none of my characters alive have a bonus to strength.

[00:27:23] Oh no sorry.

[00:27:25] I guess technically Jesus Rice has a one.

[00:27:28] Would you like me to lift on the sarcophagus lid that looks very heavy?

[00:27:32] I think we all should probably.

[00:27:34] Yep, let's all do it.

[00:27:36] That's what you want to do.

[00:27:37] How many characters do you have?

[00:27:38] Three.

[00:27:39] And you have?

[00:27:40] Three.

[00:27:41] Hey, it's like he knew the number was 10.

[00:27:42] Oh no, I didn't.

[00:27:44] Why don't you add up your strength scores?

[00:27:46] Scores?

[00:27:47] Scores.

[00:27:48] I got 40.

[00:27:49] 29.

[00:27:50] 30.

[00:27:51] 29?

[00:27:52] 34.

[00:27:53] 8, 13 and 8.

[00:27:54] Oh, three characters sorry.

[00:27:58] So, 29.

[00:27:59] 69.

[00:28:00] I see it.

[00:28:01] Nice.

[00:28:02] What's yours?

[00:28:03] 34.

[00:28:04] That's more than 100.

[00:28:05] You can lift the lid.

[00:28:06] Sweet!

[00:28:07] What inside?

[00:28:08] You are all struggling to lift that lid.

[00:28:10] Unfortunately for those who manage to lift the lid, resting inside is the accursed

[00:28:15] remains of King Relgar who rise up with conquest.

[00:28:18] You're all standing there holding this lid trying to move it off and this guy

[00:28:24] starts swinging right under the lid.

[00:28:26] Well, I don't think we'll have a choice after he slashes one of the characters.

[00:28:31] We won't be able to hold it anymore.

[00:28:34] That's not what I would have done, Jeff, but I appreciate it.

[00:28:37] I would have had him punch the goddamn lid like the Hulk and shattered it.

[00:28:41] Rising from the sarcophagus's black embrace like a nightmare is a nearly seven foot

[00:28:46] tall skeleton clad in black chainmail.

[00:28:48] It rears up with the sickening creak of grave-rotted bones lifting a massive black

[00:28:53] bladed sword on high.

[00:28:55] So yeah, it'll rise up, knock the lid right out of your arms or right out of your hands.

[00:29:01] Yeah, I'm not going to mess with that.

[00:29:02] I don't want to figure out which characters are on which side.

[00:29:05] Roll for initiative.

[00:29:06] 18.

[00:29:08] Nice.

[00:29:09] 12.

[00:29:10] 11.

[00:29:11] Okay, Cody, you're up first.

[00:29:18] I run.

[00:29:19] Okay.

[00:29:20] If it took 10 of us to lift that thing and he can knock it around.

[00:29:26] Fair.

[00:29:28] So everybody runs.

[00:29:29] Yeah, no, I don't think my three total hit points of characters would like to stay around.

[00:29:36] Three characters with three hit points.

[00:29:37] The math is fairly simple on number of hit points I have left.

[00:29:40] Spencer running out of the room.

[00:29:42] Yes.

[00:29:43] Cody, I can imagine has been actively trying to kill us and so if he's running, I'm

[00:29:47] running.

[00:29:48] All three of your characters are running.

[00:29:51] Troy, you're lucky I rolled lower than you.

[00:29:55] Yes, also running.

[00:29:58] Okay.

[00:29:59] If it was a real dick I would have ran out and closed the doors.

[00:30:02] Let me give you a few more rounds to run.

[00:30:05] Closing the door is behind me.

[00:30:08] Okay.

[00:30:09] On its turn it moves and it kicks the door open.

[00:30:11] It's coming after you guys.

[00:30:12] Oh good.

[00:30:13] Yeah, it does move faster than some of you.

[00:30:16] Cody.

[00:30:17] I run downstairs.

[00:30:18] Yeah, you can make it onto the stairs.

[00:30:21] Everybody's human, right?

[00:30:23] Yep.

[00:30:24] All your characters make it to the stairs.

[00:30:26] Even the power of cheese can't defeat some things.

[00:30:29] Spencer.

[00:30:30] I'll do the same but I have a dwarf.

[00:30:32] Yep.

[00:30:33] Troy.

[00:30:34] Yeah, running and falling down stairs.

[00:30:37] Not the money.

[00:30:38] All humans?

[00:30:39] All humans.

[00:30:40] Okay, it's going to charge your dwarf.

[00:30:43] He might miss.

[00:30:44] He might.

[00:30:45] He didn't.

[00:30:46] That's a 17 to hit.

[00:30:49] That is seven damage.

[00:30:54] Yeah, no it just...

[00:30:57] Splits in half.

[00:30:58] Splits him in half as like just all his treasure just explodes in all directions.

[00:31:03] There is $500 worth of shit, 500 gold pieces, just laying around guys so you know.

[00:31:09] Cody.

[00:31:10] Where am I at Jeff?

[00:31:11] I'm going downstairs.

[00:31:12] Yeah, you're about 10 feet down the stairs.

[00:31:14] Okay.

[00:31:15] Continuing downstairs.

[00:31:16] I'm continuing down the stairs.

[00:31:17] Okay.

[00:31:18] Is everybody continuing downstairs?

[00:31:20] Yes.

[00:31:21] Okay, where are you going once you get downstairs?

[00:31:23] I kind of like the idea of bringing them to the... let's just have a real big party.

[00:31:27] Let's bring this guy to that party.

[00:31:29] That was my thought.

[00:31:30] I don't know if that's where you were going but...

[00:31:32] We're going down the stairs.

[00:31:35] Let's go.

[00:31:36] Okay, you get downstairs.

[00:31:37] My party might jump in the dumbwaiter.

[00:31:40] Okay.

[00:31:41] Ride the chain down.

[00:31:42] You hear it pounding down the stairs behind you.

[00:31:44] Where are you going?

[00:31:45] You're going for the dumbwaiter.

[00:31:46] I'm going to continue going down the stairs.

[00:31:48] Well, no you get down...

[00:31:49] Oh yeah, I'm going to the...

[00:31:50] To the other stairs?

[00:31:51] Yeah, yeah.

[00:31:52] Okay.

[00:31:53] Yeah, they're downstairs.

[00:31:54] Okay.

[00:31:55] How are you going down the dumbwaiter?

[00:31:56] Recklessly or carefully?

[00:31:58] Three Stooges style.

[00:31:59] Whoop, whoop, whoop.

[00:32:00] One grabs the rope, the next one jumps in and grabs the rope, the third one jumps in and grabs the rope.

[00:32:03] What's your strength scores?

[00:32:05] 29, we did this.

[00:32:06] Yeah.

[00:32:07] Okay.

[00:32:08] We'll see here in a minute.

[00:32:09] That's fine.

[00:32:10] Okay, you guys get downstairs.

[00:32:11] You hear it pounding down the stairs behind you.

[00:32:14] Make me a strength check.

[00:32:17] Group strength check.

[00:32:18] I believe one of them has a plus one.

[00:32:20] Yep, Cheezus does.

[00:32:21] Cheezus does, that's who he does.

[00:32:23] I was like, it's not the shaman.

[00:32:25] We'll use the metal die.

[00:32:26] For extra strength and power.

[00:32:29] That is a nat 20. 21.

[00:32:31] Awesome.

[00:32:32] Give that man a chip so I can take it away from him.

[00:32:35] You will make it down safe.

[00:32:37] Yes.

[00:32:38] Use that chip.

[00:32:40] You see him jump in and...

[00:32:42] They all go down the dumb waiter.

[00:32:45] Okay, what are you doing?

[00:32:47] Continuing to run down the stairs to the...

[00:32:49] Yes, you're down the stairs.

[00:32:50] Where are you going?

[00:32:51] Towards the cult party.

[00:32:52] Okay.

[00:32:53] There aren't a lot of rooms left to explore, Jeff.

[00:32:55] We fucked...

[00:32:56] No, I know.

[00:32:57] To four puzzles already and the puzzle we did solve is trying to murder us.

[00:33:00] Yeah.

[00:33:01] So...

[00:33:02] Yeah, I don't know why I thought that we would have time to come back and solve those other puzzles.

[00:33:05] That's not how this game works.

[00:33:06] It isn't.

[00:33:07] I was like, we're just past, past.

[00:33:08] We'll come back to it.

[00:33:09] Nope.

[00:33:10] Well, it isn't the way that works when we wake up to big scary angry thing.

[00:33:14] Okay.

[00:33:15] You guys charge into the area where the cult thing is going on.

[00:33:19] Oh, I forgot.

[00:33:20] Oh well.

[00:33:21] Too late now.

[00:33:22] What are you doing once you enter the area with the cult?

[00:33:24] There's two chambers.

[00:33:25] One's about 60 feet.

[00:33:26] The next one is about 60 feet.

[00:33:28] There's 40 feet from the entry to the chamber to...

[00:33:31] Describe the monsters that were kind of like leaning out and like how bad those boys look.

[00:33:37] I mean, they're undead creatures chained up in these alcoves.

[00:33:42] They're like test tube things.

[00:33:44] Like Wolverine and his bubbly thing where he's being tested on by Weapon X or whatever.

[00:33:48] How strong are the chains look that are holding them?

[00:33:50] What's your score in metallurgy?

[00:33:52] I think that...

[00:33:53] The armorer...

[00:33:54] I was about to say the stonemason might know he's dead.

[00:33:57] The armorer might know too but he's also dead.

[00:33:59] Is he?

[00:34:00] Yeah.

[00:34:01] He can roll a d10.

[00:34:02] Are you stopping to examine it?

[00:34:03] Getting the close look?

[00:34:04] No, no, no, no.

[00:34:05] Yeah.

[00:34:06] I think...

[00:34:07] I think my best bet, because I have no good bets, would be to jump into one of the alcoves

[00:34:17] with a zombie with a couple of my characters and try to hit the chain to free it.

[00:34:22] Yeah, why not?

[00:34:23] Okay.

[00:34:24] Team Chaos!

[00:34:25] I mean...

[00:34:26] Maybe it's just one of those chains like the links at like theme parks and stuff.

[00:34:31] Maybe you just undo the end.

[00:34:32] It'll just kind of...

[00:34:33] Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:34:34] Sure.

[00:34:35] Hopefully.

[00:34:36] We'll see.

[00:34:37] Okay, so two of your characters go diving into one of these alcoves.

[00:34:40] Okay.

[00:34:41] I do think those things are going to eat your balls though.

[00:34:43] Yeah, I figure.

[00:34:44] As you dive in, one of them is going to get an attack against one of your characters.

[00:34:47] You pick.

[00:34:48] Mr. Ed.

[00:34:49] You really don't like Mr. Ed, do you?

[00:34:51] No, I've been trying to kill him for a while.

[00:34:53] You're not doing a very good job.

[00:34:55] It's 12 to hit.

[00:34:56] That's affirmative.

[00:34:57] Three points of damage.

[00:34:58] You killed him!

[00:34:59] He's dead.

[00:35:00] What is your other character going to do?

[00:35:03] Take the mace to...

[00:35:06] Roll an attack.

[00:35:09] Seven.

[00:35:10] That's enough to hit a chain.

[00:35:11] Roll damage.

[00:35:12] Four.

[00:35:13] That's a significant amount of damage to a chain.

[00:35:15] That's decent.

[00:35:16] You'll snap the chain.

[00:35:17] Cool.

[00:35:18] One zombie freed.

[00:35:19] Unless it's a link and they just pull the chain out completely.

[00:35:21] I don't know how it's all done together.

[00:35:23] Maybe it's like a theme park ride where it's just going all the way through the middle

[00:35:26] and you break one and it just pulls.

[00:35:28] No, I'm assuming it's a ring in the wall and the chain goes through.

[00:35:31] He busted the ring.

[00:35:32] Does the chain go through all of them or does the chain go through each one individually?

[00:35:35] No.

[00:35:36] Each one is separate.

[00:35:37] One is free.

[00:35:38] What's everybody else doing?

[00:35:39] You've seen Pirates of the Caribbean, right?

[00:35:41] Yes.

[00:35:42] The Jack Sparrow run?

[00:35:43] Yeah, that's what we're doing.

[00:35:44] Directly into whatever's going on down there?

[00:35:47] Yeah.

[00:35:48] Okay.

[00:35:49] Basically.

[00:35:50] I think that our best option now is to cause as much chaos as we can.

[00:35:54] That's my thought.

[00:35:55] We're totally screwed.

[00:35:57] As your character is trying to avoid being chewed on by this undead thing that just,

[00:36:02] they just unchain, he sees a big ass skeleton go run past.

[00:36:07] Doesn't even notice you.

[00:36:08] Skeleton?

[00:36:09] Yes.

[00:36:10] Huh.

[00:36:11] It's a seven foot tall skeleton with a big ass sword.

[00:36:13] Oh, I didn't realize it was a skeleton.

[00:36:14] I thought it was an armor.

[00:36:15] Nope.

[00:36:16] You guys are hauling ass into the ritual area.

[00:36:18] What do you do when you get there?

[00:36:20] Holy shit!

[00:36:21] You guys see this skeleton?

[00:36:22] Okay.

[00:36:23] You have a round.

[00:36:24] They are surprised by you being there.

[00:36:27] What are you doing?

[00:36:28] How many cultists are there?

[00:36:29] That would have been good to know.

[00:36:32] About 65,000.

[00:36:33] It looks like wood stock.

[00:36:35] 65,000 would not be enough.

[00:36:39] A bluish glimmer radiates from far ahead, silhouetting a mini-pillared hall where

[00:36:44] several dark figures join in blasphemous chanting.

[00:36:47] Their voices rise in a score of sinister echoes, inhuman as the howling beasts and

[00:36:52] that articulate enough for you to capture a single word repeated again and again.

[00:36:56] Mordigian.

[00:36:57] Mordigian.

[00:36:58] Beyond the ring of chanting figures, the hall ends in a central vault beset with

[00:37:03] four massive urns filled with skulls that blaze with a sickly blue fire.

[00:37:07] A vast black altar table is lit by the glare of the own unholy urns, its surface

[00:37:12] topped with dozens of corpses.

[00:37:14] Before the table is a crowned woman and a sinister figure that stands hunched and

[00:37:18] beast-like beneath violet robes.

[00:37:20] That's five, seven, maybe nine?

[00:37:24] Nine cultists, one queen, one priest.

[00:37:28] Surely this guy can take nine of these, right?

[00:37:30] What do you want to do?

[00:37:32] I leave it up to you, Troy.

[00:37:33] Why me?

[00:37:34] How quickly do you want to die?

[00:37:35] Because I know how to solve all the puzzles.

[00:37:37] There's two people here.

[00:37:38] Other people here.

[00:37:39] Spencer's hanging out.

[00:37:41] Spencer!

[00:37:42] I'm releasing zombies.

[00:37:43] It's going great.

[00:37:44] I'm down to one guy.

[00:37:46] So yeah, I got shit.

[00:37:48] So the skeleton is essentially keeping stride with us because he's going the same speed as us, right?

[00:37:53] Yeah.

[00:37:54] He is within sight behind you.

[00:37:56] We can run all the way to the other side of the room.

[00:37:59] Half of us are still wearing cultist robes, including the minstrel who's screaming,

[00:38:03] holy shit, did you see this guy behind me?

[00:38:05] My goal would be to...

[00:38:08] I have two different plans.

[00:38:10] Essentially, most of the characters do one.

[00:38:12] Well, no.

[00:38:13] Two separate plans because most characters would do one thing and hopefully

[00:38:17] one other character can do something else.

[00:38:19] Gotcha.

[00:38:20] Because I think I might have figured something out.

[00:38:21] Which character is doing the other thing?

[00:38:24] And what is the other thing?

[00:38:26] Kissing his ass goodbye.

[00:38:29] Rolling up into a fetal position.

[00:38:31] Does my being back from the dead status,

[00:38:34] I know it was a negative four to rolls, but did that change my movement?

[00:38:39] No.

[00:38:40] No.

[00:38:41] You'd have been dead by now.

[00:38:42] Yeah, that's my sense.

[00:38:43] Just making sure.

[00:38:45] So I would see the party run as far to the cultists as we can,

[00:38:52] and if they start running at us, essentially flank outwards

[00:38:57] and sort of hoping the two forces would bash into each other

[00:39:01] while Steve would run behind the skeleton and go back upstairs.

[00:39:08] So Steve is attempting to circumnavigate the skeleton.

[00:39:11] Yeah.

[00:39:12] Okay.

[00:39:13] Roll an agility check, see how well you can hide.

[00:39:15] Mine is four.

[00:39:16] Or just stay out of sight for a few seconds.

[00:39:18] I mean, yeah.

[00:39:20] He would find a dark corner or a statue or something to hide behind.

[00:39:24] Yeah.

[00:39:25] Roll to see how well you do.

[00:39:27] I roll to 13.

[00:39:29] Decent.

[00:39:30] And what are the other two doing?

[00:39:31] They're three.

[00:39:32] Three?

[00:39:33] I have all my characters.

[00:39:34] Not for long.

[00:39:35] Oh, I know.

[00:39:36] They would be running towards the group of cultists as in like...

[00:39:40] Right.

[00:39:41] They are to the group of cultists.

[00:39:43] What are they doing once they get there?

[00:39:45] Taking a 90 degree turn and running towards one of the other walls.

[00:39:49] Okay.

[00:39:50] Yeah.

[00:39:51] All right.

[00:39:52] Anything, any action.

[00:39:53] You've got your move out of the way.

[00:39:55] I get it.

[00:39:56] Okay.

[00:39:57] Yeah.

[00:39:58] Mine as well.

[00:39:59] Trapper John, take a shot.

[00:40:00] At?

[00:40:01] At the skelly.

[00:40:02] What?

[00:40:03] The big skeleton that you're dragging along with you?

[00:40:05] Are we trying to keep that one alive?

[00:40:08] Are we?

[00:40:09] Why didn't we just run from it?

[00:40:10] I don't know.

[00:40:11] I don't care what you do, Trapper.

[00:40:13] I'm assuming that thing can hit harder than any one of those cultists.

[00:40:17] It is 1v9.

[00:40:18] Sure.

[00:40:19] All right.

[00:40:20] Including a priestess or an evil 300 year old queen and some sort of beastman priest.

[00:40:28] Surrounded by the giant black thing oozing on top of or around or nearby the altar.

[00:40:34] 14 to hit a jackal.

[00:40:36] Okay.

[00:40:37] What's the hit?

[00:40:39] Four.

[00:40:40] I believe that's enough to kill it.

[00:40:41] Yeah, it was three.

[00:40:42] Nice.

[00:40:43] Yeah.

[00:40:44] Don Knotts will aim at another jackal.

[00:40:46] 13.

[00:40:47] Yeah.

[00:40:48] For four.

[00:40:49] That'll do it.

[00:40:50] Two drop.

[00:40:51] And he's got a spear.

[00:40:54] I suppose in the midst of running and strafing, can I take a stab?

[00:41:00] You'll end in combat.

[00:41:02] Okay.

[00:41:03] Then he will hold on to that end.

[00:41:05] Okay.

[00:41:06] Yeah.

[00:41:07] Get there and cut to the left.

[00:41:09] You notice there is a stairway down at the end in the left corner.

[00:41:14] The stairway's going up or down?

[00:41:16] Up.

[00:41:17] You got anything you want to do?

[00:41:18] Fucking Walter Payton, Reggie White, you name it.

[00:41:20] I am running through those guys like a defensive line and taking that boy all the way to Alter Town.

[00:41:26] Our title track, Bustin' Loose with Lead, is used under Creative Commons Attribution 4 International License

[00:41:40] and was produced by Jason Shaw at Audionautics.com.

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[00:42:10] Bye.